"If meat is murder, live export is the slow boat to hell."
Please, please, please, let me get this quiz right this time.
A bulbous salutation to you all.
Three highly quotable men. Three must-read autobiographies. One surprisingly difficult quiz.
Hey boy, last night I dreamt that somebody loved me.
And all through the house, not a creature was stirring... except for a few pastel goths on Tumblr.
Sex, polls, and rock n' roll.
No, we don't all eat hot pot and drink at the Rovers Return every night.
"I'm throwing my arms around Los Angeles." — Moz
To celebrate Morrissey's arrival on Twitter, a look at the important and highly informative data visualisations of @troubledmozza.
Time to find out if you're Prince's latest lover, a Bowie groupie, or a Stevie Nicks conquest.
Heaven knows that parents just don't understand.
Singer speaks out on animal rights in typically forthright manner.
Ever wonder if your frenemies are mutual? Hate With Friends will tell you.
Stop me if you've heard this before!
"His music will outlive time itself," wrote the singer.
This charming, violin-playing, gravy-smelling, otter-cuddling man.
Two global superstars, two timeless autobiographies. Can you work out who said what?
Plus an exclusive interview with Calvin and Hobbes creator Bill Watterson, 20 "healthy" costumes for Halloween, and sex advice from a fire artist.
Before the internet, the best way to find out about cool music was watch MTV after midnight on Sundays. Or, you know, set your VCR to tape it.
Snoopy and Morrissey is a meeting of minds that somehow makes total sense.
And the perfect Tumblr This Charming Charlie has all the proof you need.
Never one to mince words, Moz hates on Cyndi Lauper and confesses to liking Duran Duran.
The music industry is all like, "Gotta Catch 'Em All!"
Wow, this is beautiful. Via Proof Spirit.
When your ability to make arts & crafts doesn't exactly match your obsessive fandom. Happy nightmares!
Including Missy Elliott Smith, Bone Uggs N Harmony, and Hillbilly Corgan. Justin Hager is amazing.
"This is not an article about Morrissey, as much as he'd like it to be, as much as I'm allowing him to permeate the air with his foul and fey musk."
As evidenced by this Letter of Note: "I'm unhappy, hope you're unhappy too." This note from a pre-Smiths Moz to his pen pal is amazing.
From weed grinders to Snuggies to condoms, these musicians went WAY beyond simple t-shirts and hoodies.
Medical issues force singer off the road.
Don't worry, he's fine! Here's everything you need to know about the intense flurry of recent Moz news, including his hospitalization.
Nooooooo, you guys! Don't do this! Think of the children!!
He laughs. He licks! HE TAKES OFF HIS SHIRT. Who needs Ryan Gosling in a world where Morrissey exists?
Just sit back and pretend you're hanging out at a very angst-ridden hotel lounge.
Whether you're into boy bands or Krautrock, you don't truly love a band until you've knit a sweater with their name on it.
Impromptu tattoos, accidental moonings, uncontrollable sobbing and other things that happen when you go see Moz four times in seven days.
Move over, McKayla Maroney — we have a new winner here. Morrissey failed to see the humor during his interview on last night's Colbert Report, so let's break down his reactions into GIFs.
Big Mouth strikes again...and again...and again...
I <3 The Moz and I don't care who knows it!
Morrissey with a cat on his head.
“I can smile,” Morrissey once insisted to an interviewer from UK magazine Details. That’s as it may be, but over the years, Moz has cultivated the image of being one of music’s more morose characters.
Happy World Goth Day! Here's a special goth rock playlist to help you celebrate. Subcultures, Yay!
Now we know the true source of Morrissey's endless suffering. These are actually from a 1999 coloring book by Brian Brooks.
I'm a finger puppet and I need to be loved. Just like everybody else does.
Morrissey decides to take a break from the music industry and open up a new fast food restaurant.
If you ask me, I won't say meow. How could I? (ArtFagCity via @rcbth.)