"i failed a student for their midterm grade, and they just sent me an email that just says 'bruh.'"
Call your parents.
"Somewhere right now, in a brightly lit and unfamiliar kitchen, a fresher is discovering pasta and pesto for the first time..."
This really is the only Freshers' Guide you need.
Tea bags, always tea bags.
"Would you like a toastie? How about a chat about Jesus?"
"I'm too old for this shit." – me, every single day
Pet = good.
I asked BuzzFeed's UK editorial team: "What is the one thing you wish you'd known as a fresher?"
It's all fun and games until you accidentally fart in somebody's face.
That student loan has to last you the whole 12 weeks.
There will be vomit.
Sorry, but no amount of coffee or fresh air will sober you up.
Where there's alcohol, there's mistakes. A lot of goddamn mistakes.
What's your name? Where d'you come from? And what did you get in your A-levels?
No you can't have an extension.
The prospectus didn't prepare you for this. Nothing could.
Warning: You shouldn't do any of these things (probably).
Contains an excellent recipe for "vodka squash".
Why is the King always asleep?
GO AWAY, YOU DON'T CARE WHERE I'M FROM.
Or rather, stride of pride. Amirite?
From the DHT to Prow, there are just some things you'll never forget about the 'Burgh.
Stuck in Rutland? Good luck.
Loughborough University, hang your heads in shame.
Everything on this list will inevitably happen to you.
University won't be exactly like an episode of "Fresh Meat". But it won't be far off...
Bye bye, home.