1.
i’m not gonna ask you again, what the fuck is in your mouth
2.
4 Pictures 1 Story
3.
My husband sent me this, saying that our cat refuses to move, so his ear is now an `enter key`
4.
Saw a thicc ass starfish at the aquarium today 😌
5.
If I pay $40 for a haunted house I better die
6.
“you think you can do these things nemo but you just can’t!”
7.
So it was my cousins 3rd birthday and instead of having a normal theme she chose this
8.
never forget the time my brother missed the bus and wrote my mom this note
9.
You get 3 wishes https://t.co/1FxzTHCk6b
10.
Can someone write an article on millenials killing the doorbell industry by texting "here"
11.
me, low on iron: my vision when I stand: * * . * . * . * . * . * . . * * . * . *. . *. . * * * . *. * . . * . * .
12.
do you ever catch yourself being mean for no reason and you’re just like???? go take a nap?????
13.
Now........that’s fashion
14.
So I painted my birth control packet.
15.
Honestly my take away from this chart is that donuts are healthier than I thought https://t.co/VCs5ZCPQqE
16.
Avon Targaryen. https://t.co/55aBc8P0uD
17.
Today I thought I saw a woman dressed as a handmaid about to jump from a building. I called 911.
18.
My niece has her bird trained to attack anyone she screams at 😂😂😂
19.
My sociology professor keeps an alphabetic list of new slang terms he learns from students and I will never get over it
20.
The shit I have to deal with🤦♀️😂
21.
my sister saw two unaccompanied little children in a trench coat giggling amongst themselves yesterday and i am absolutely howling
22.
*using Ouija board* "hello, is there anyone there" *Y* *O* *U* *U* *U* *U* "ah damnit this is a Soulja board*
23.
He Sent Her A Meme On Instagram But She Already Saw It On Twitter - Rupi Kaur
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The most important thing you’ll see today
25.
This what I meant https://t.co/68ptvsporn
26.
socrates: to do is to be plato: to be is to do scooby: do be do
27.
this is our farm dog Captain. he points at the chickens every day and we don’t know why lol
28.
let her perform her spells in peace https://t.co/DFA1GxTvZu
29.
Me leaving the house without eating breakfast, dehydrated, and with 2 hours of sleep
30.
at the gym i said subscription instead of membership and the girl replied with 'lol this isnt a pharmacy'. bitch thats a prescription were both stupid
31.
Me checking my bank account and calling my friends to make plans anyway
32.
RT if u love keanu reeves
33.
do u ever wanna take a nap but the nap doesn’t wanna take u
34.
brain: break it me: why? brain: you gotta
35.
this is how lil kids cough
36.
obtuse rubber goose green moose guava juice giant snake birthday cake large fries chocolate shake https://t.co/mO9yYHXjYx
37.
Thanks for the clarification, Dad.
38.
me when someone tries to get to know me https://t.co/M7bQWioKe7
39.
when tinkerbell started dying because she didn’t get enough attention...... i felt that
40.
So we had to put a cone on my dog again. My cat loves it
41.
My money as soon as I earn it
42.
Beyoncef https://t.co/HE7Iuqla0O