1.
You think slimness is fakeable.
2.
You wonder whether your stomach cramps could be cancer.
3.
You care about the marital arrangements of people you don't know.
4.
You use the word "va-jay-jay." Unironically.
5.
You think that owning pictures of himself means your boyfriend is a psychopath.
6.
This is what you think other women look like.
7.
You've debated the criminal status of cellulite.
8.
You judge the moral status of cheating based on hotness.
9.
You think that you can drastically reduce your weight, without surgery, by tonight.
11.
You reckon five minutes of work on your appearance will knock off five whole years.
12.
You genuinely believe that there are seven very specific questions that every guy is just dying for you to ask him.
13.
You suspect food may be your frenemy.
Conclusion? Stop. Reading. Now.