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    19 Secrets Wedding Caterers Won't Tell You

    We're terrified of spilling red wine on the bride's dress.

    1. You'd be surprised at how many couples forget to pick a first dance.


    But don't worry: We have countless CDs on standby for when this happens.

    2. Interrupting groups of wedding guests to offer round canapés is incredibly awkward.

    3. Topping up champagne is impossibly hard if guests don't tilt their glasses.

    4. And there is nothing as stressful as starting off a champagne waterfall.

    Sony Pictures

    It takes serious practice.

    5. Working behind a hot buffet is the worst job.

    6. But table service is pretty nerve-wracking too. Not spilling stuff is always a challenge, but it's more important when it's the best day of someone's life.

    7. But most of all, we're terrified of spilling red wine down the bridal gown.

    8. Even if we're not thinking of getting married, we can't help but compare your wedding day to how we'd do things.

    Warner Bros.

    If you have particularly nice canapés, for example, we'll make a mental note.

    9. We get a bit emotional at your speeches, even though we don't know you.

    10. We love gossiping about your family politics.

    11. There is a special place reserved in hell for people who have wedding karaoke.

    New Line Cinema

    We get that your guests are having a nice time, but listening to drunk people screech into a microphone while you're stone cold sober and clearing up their plates is not fun.

    12. And "Summer Nights" is hands-down the worst track.

    Paramount Pictures

    That screechy bit at the end in particular.

    13. We can't help it if the bar tab has run out.


    So no matter how many times you moan that the couple are stingy, we can't pour you another pint unless you hand over some cash.

    14. We love it when you don't go for a traditional fruit cake.

    15. It doesn't matter how many times you offer to buy us a drink, we're probably not allowed to accept it.

    16. You think drunk relatives are a problem when you're a wedding guest? They're 10 times worse when you're being paid not to be rude to them.

    Miramax Films

    We like chatting to wedding guests, but when your uncle's had his tenth G&T of the night and is talking about the time you left home for university, we get a bit bored.

    17. Although working at weddings is great fun, finishing a shift at 3am is not.


    And it never gets any easier.

    18. The smell of grease never leaves our uniform.

    19. And, although we don't know how it got there, we'll find confetti in our hair for weeks afterwards.