21 Jokes That Will Make Anyone Who Owns A Fitbit Laugh

“I remember when peer pressure was all about drugs and promiscuous sex. Now it’s Fitbit and who has the best gluten free recipes.”


If I hit my Fitbit goal I don't move anymore. It can get a little dicey sitting in a crosswalk with cars honking and swerving around me.

— SingleBabyMama (@_SingleBabyMama)

I just ordered a Fitbit and my bank called to see if my card was stolen.

— JAY [ham] KAY (@NurseMurderer)

I make sure to put my fitbit on before getting dressed so I get credit for all the calories I burn trying on 400 outfits before I pick one.

— bananafanafofisa (@lisaxy424)

I woke up mid sprint last night because I was dreaming there was a bear in my apartment. I'm pissed I didn't sleep with my Fitbit on.

— Mare_Bear (@Willie_Ham)

What's kind of collar is your cat wearing? Normal. Is that a Fitbit? No. Really? You don't know how many carbs in a blue jay, do you?

— Christopher Moore (@TheAuthorGuy)

Friend: I'd go crazy if I had to wear an ankle monitor and have every step tracked. Me (nodding): How's your #Fitbit doing?

— lawprofblawg (@lawprofblawg)

I remember when peer pressure was all about drugs and promiscuous sex. Now it's Fitbit and who has the best gluten free recipes.

— Ryan (@swimmer_ryry)

Accidentally connected my Fitbit account to Facebook and now everyone knows I only walked 13 steps yesterday.

— mark (@TheCatWhisprer)

Calm down 'Fitbit' joggers. I can drink one 5-Hour Energy and reach my target heart rate without even getting off my couch

— Saucy Kensington (@Book_Krazy)

I've reprogrammed my FitBit to allow for more me time. And by reprogram, I mean I've attached it to the leg of a deer. I was born to run.

— Staçicle (@girl_a_whirl)

You know you're a bad dancer when your Fitbit thought you were swimming at the club last night.

— adrianna (@adriannastyIes)

Just ate an order of cheese fries and smoke started coming out of my Fitbit.

— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22)

Fitbit dashboard of a college student: Sunday: 14 hours of sleep, 100 steps Monday-Saturday: 4 hours of sleep, 10k steps

— Lindsay Ryan (@Laahh_5)

On my home screen I surrounded the Fitbit app with a bunch of food delivery apps so it knows what's up.

— mark (@TheCatWhisprer)

I can't get out of bed, my Fitbit is charging and my steps won't count

— Pugnado (@LuvPug)

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Tabatha Leggett is head of buzz at BuzzFeed UK and is based in London.
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