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Every Girl Drake Has Ever Mentioned In A Song

Only from his albums, though, because there are only so many hours in a day.

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If you're a Drake fan, you know homeboy loves to rap about women. Ex-girlfriends, strippers, family members, random women from the road — the list seems endless.

So, like any good reporter, I decided to get to the bottom of the mystery and crunch the numbers. Three days, five albums, and seventy-six songs later, I realized the list was longer than even I expected. Aubrey wasn't lying when he said he has a really big team, and I need a really big ring (or Pulitzer Prize) for not quitting in the middle of this.

Let's just start with the A's and work our way down. There is...

1. Aaliyah

2. Alisha

3. Ashley (cousin)

4. Biama (cousin)

5. Bria

6. Catya

7. Cece

8. Chyna

9. Courtney

10. Diana (could be a "Dirty Diana" reference, but you never know with him)

11. Ellen

12. Ericka (cousin)

13. Ericka Lee ("Marvin's Room" voicemail)

14. Evelyn (grandma)

15. His babysitter who he ended up having sex with later on in life

16. His ex who asked him where he's moving when he replied "onto better things"

17. His ex who goes to Georgia State where tuition is handled by some random n****a who lives in Atlanta who she only sees when she feels obligated

18. His ex-girl who's the female version of him

19. His famous girlfriend whose ass keep getting thicker than a plot does

20. Jada Pinkett

21. Jade

22. Julia (cousin)

23. Karrueche

24. Keyshia Cole

25. Lisa Bonet ("Zoe mama")

26. Lissa

27. Madonna

28. Maliah

29. Marilyn Monroes

30. Mrs. Fields

31. Nebby

32. Nicki Minaj

33. Paris Morton

34. Penny Lane

35. Porscha

36. Sandi (mom)

37. Serena

38. Shorty up on Glengrove who loves when he catches his tempo

39. Summer

40. Summer P. (Same Summer? Lord knows.)

41. Tammy

42. Tasha (cousin)

43. Tatyana

44. The 305 stripper whose hustle never goes unnoticed

45. The 305 stripper's best friend who bartends

46. The 305 stripper whose mama who used to live at church on Sundays

47. The 305 stripper whose roommate has good credit

48. The Spanish girl from uptown New York City who love him like he's Aventura

49. The brand-new girl with a brand-new boob job (stitches still showing)

50. The centerfold whose text he didn't reply to

51. The ex he gave all his emotional baggage to carry

52. The ex he wanted to marry who is a wedding planner in Atlanta

53. The fitness trainer his mom is trying to hook him up with

54. The flower child, beautiful child, he's in her zone

55. The girl from Lucky Strike who didn't love him

56. The girl from the jungle (a neighborhood in Canada)

57. The girl from the South who used to dance in Texas but now cleans his house

58. The girl he should propose to but is just a little too perfect, a little too worth it

59. The girl he tells not to go get married or engaged because he can't lose her

60. The girl he thought was the girl of his dreams from the strip club (he was wrong, tho)

61. The girl he trusted who set him up

62. The girl he used to sleep with on the floor when she lived in the basement

63. The girl he's dating who's making triple what he's making

64. The girl he's with in all them magazines

65. The girl he's with whose ass is so big that it's partly embarrassing

66. The girl his uncle told him drives his whip like it's hers

67. The girl who he wants to save but is a danger to his health because she wants to be somebody else

68. The girl everything that he writes is either for or about, so he can always be with her when he's without her (all of the women above, then?)

69. The girl who he's telling to go back to her unstable ex because they're a perfect match

70. The girl who misses the old Drake

71. The girl who sounds so smart like she graduated college like she went to Yale but she probably went to Howard

72. The girl who will sleep with nobody but him (if you ask her, she'll admit it)

73. The girl whose age her boyfriend needs to stop acting like (Kylie Jenner)

74. The girl who's still the one that he adores, the one that would tell him with no hesitation, "It's yours"

75. The stripper who he was waiting for at St. Regis up on Briar Oaks because he had some shit for her to come get

76. The stripper whose people should have nothing to say because she's done it her way

77. The (aforementioned) stripper's girlfriends who tell her that she does the right thing

78. The student who works weekends in the city who he keeps telling to take her fucking heels off and work it, babe

79. The woman he messed with unprotected who text him saying she wish she would've kept it

80. The woman who he was lying next to when he got the aforementioned text and read it

81. The woman who told him to "kiss me like you miss me, fuck me like you hate me, and when you're fucking someone else just fuck her like she ain't me"

82. The women he has living off him whose hotel and flights he's ashamed he's paid for

83. Whichever of his main things told him "take a deep breath, you're too worried about being the best out"

84. Whoever's babymama he took a picture with who he hopes frames it

85. Whoever's girlfriend he knows well, just not in public

86. Whoever's girlfriend was at Drake's house for three days because she got too attached

87. Winnie (Harlow)

88. Zoe (Kravitz)

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