Recently, Reddit user u/Fresh_Paint1970 asked in r/AskReddit: "Women of Reddit, what's an instant 'green flag' that you would see in a guy?" Here's what they said.
1. "On our first date, my now-husband and I went to a pub after dinner. By coincidence, a couple of his friends were already there. 1.) He was super excited to introduce me to his friends, and 2.) His friends were the best kind of people. Both were big green flags for me."
3. "I think openness is a huge green flag. Being self-aware and willing to learn and understand other perspectives and people."
4. "Seeing them actively advocate for less privileged groups of people. Going beyond 'thoughts and prayers' for humans who need it."
5. "If they can control their emotions, voice, and composure when they're frustrated or angry."
7. "Listening to the word no, and not trying to persuade me into anything I said no to."
8. "Knowing when it's appropriate to react seriously or humorously. I used to date someone who'd start to tell jokes when I'd tell them about harder things in my life."
10. "Consistency. Not having to wonder if they like you or not. It feels natural, and they don’t wait 1,000 years to reply to your texts. Screw that."
13. "Not calling all their exes wild and unhinged, and being able to admit when they were the problem."
14. "Treating their parents right. I know family dynamics are complicated, but showing some level of respect and being, especially while others are around is a big green flag to me."
15. "When they're kind even when they're not given kindness in return. They're not a doormat, but not spiteful either."
16. "Asking questions about the stuff that I enjoy even if they doesn’t inherently understand. My now-husband did this when we started dating, and does it to this day. He’ll let me ramble about chemistry or other things he doesn’t quite get just to see me smile."
17. "Having the ability to make the other person feel comfortable and safe in their presence. That's why I am with my fiancé. Not once did he force me to do anything or initiate anything physical without permission."
Answers have been edited for length and/or clarity.