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32 Reasons Why I Could Never Be A Millennial

TLDR; nothing worked that well and TV shows were a lot more problematic.

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So as one of BuzzFeed's resident Gen Z-ers, I've decided to share some of the MAAAAAAAAANY things I don't understand about millennials, and why I, personally, could NEVA EVA be one. (Just to clarify: No hate, just...confusion.)


3. TV shows were WAAAAAAAAY more problematic.

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Like on Gilmore Girls when Luke called Kirk's bag "gay"? Or the whole "fat Monica" running gag on Friends? Or, IDK, literally any of these!!! 100% would NOT FLY in 2018.

4. Saved by the Bell in general.

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The brilliant folks over at Funny or Die even made this whole series, aptly titled Zack Morris Is Trash, to delve into the problematic nature of the show (and especially its protagonist). This episode's called "The Time Zack Morris Lied About Being Jewish To Go To A Baseball Game"!

5. Buying CDs.

Life before a Spotify subscription? Tragic.

6. Or buying any kind of physical media, for that matter.

I think the last time I saw one of these antiques was next to my grandparents' toilet, reserved solely for long poops. Print is dead!!!


7. Not having a finsta.,

For those of you who are a little lost, "rinsta" means "real Instagram" and is where Gen Z-ers post their more attractive, presentable pictures. A "finsta" means "fake Instagram" and is almost always private, and only followed by close friends. Finstas are where we post more ~unflattering~ pictures, party pictures, and memes, usually.

8. Getting internet in the mail...?

How did this even work?! And furthermore, were there even any websites people actually WANTED to spend 250 hours on back then?!

10. Printing out MapQuest directions.

This is giving me flashbacks of my family road trip in 2004. The scent of hot dogs from 7/11, the popping sound of our minivan's back left tire, my father's subsequent subdued rage...*sighs nostalgically*.


12. Putting food on your fingers???

Fruit Roll-Ups? Bugles?! On your FINGIES?! Ew!!! This is reason #5346 why I carry around tiny bottles of CVS hand sanitizer AT 👏 ALL 👏 TIMES. 👏

13. These dumb things where you stick one finger in each end and then they get stuck and it's supposed to be "fun."

You KNEW what was going to happen, but you always did it anyway. Why were you like this?


15. And when you finally got a shiny new Nokia, having to press buttons MULTIPLE TIMES to get to a letter while texting.

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Sexting must've really built up a lot of 266844422244462844466666. Just saying.

16. Blowing into things to get them to work.

Instagram: @_todayskidswillneverknoww_

TBH I don't even know what he's blowing into???

17. Going to Blockbuster.

All I remember is having a temper tantrum when they didn't have the Mary-Kate and Ashley movie I wanted, so I'm gonna agree to disagree on this one.

18. Watching a movie and wondering, "Where have I seen that actor?"

My dad once met Mario Lopez and told me that, up close, it looks like he doesn't have any pores. IDK why I brought this up, but it's just always stayed with me.


19. Having to look things up in an encyclopedia.

Honestly, being smart was so much more work back then. Shout-outs to Google for getting me through school!!! #blessed

21. Having someone tell you, "OMG, you have to listen to this band!" and then having to be like, "Yeah, fat chance I'm gonna spend $15 on that."

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Discovering new music back then sounds...expensive.


24. Not having caller ID!!!

Imagine picking up the phone and NOT ALREADY KNOWING who you were expecting to talk to.


31. Having to actually watch the news to get the news.

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Like, news didn't just ping on your phone and show up on your newsfeed. You had to stop what you were doing, sit down, and actually WATCH it.