If you're a true AstroHoe™ — the OFFICIAL term for someone interested in astrology — chances are you have the Co—Star app.
And if you have Co—Star, chances are exponentially higher that you receive their infamous "Your day at a glance" horoscope notifications.
Some of these horoscope notifications can be pretty...blunt, to say the least:
co star coming for necks
So naturally, Twitter has started to meme them, and they're gosh darn fantastic:
1.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃I see you’ve got ur clown ┃ ┃suit on like you always do ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
2.
🌑 ＣＯ — ＳＴＡＲ ¹ ᵐᶦⁿ ᵃᵍᵒ 𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕕𝕒𝕪 𝕒𝕥 𝕒 𝕘𝕝𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝗣𝘂𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝗽𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀.
3.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃why the fuck are you drinking┃ ┃a whole bottle of wine and ┃ ┃texting your shitty ex. ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
4.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔ＣＯ － ＳＴＡＲ ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃I'm already crying for you | ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
5.
nobody: me: co-star: ╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃I see you’ve taken an ┃ ┃extra sip of dumb bitch ┃ ┃juice today ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
6.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃put that mfn iced coffee down┃ ┃ n drink some water. ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
7.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔ＣＯ － ＳＴＡＲ ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃I’m behind you with a knife ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
8.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃Be gay do crimes ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━╯
9.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃you're not actually baby ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━╯
10.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃fuck your chicken strips. ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
11.
Me: Co-Star: Your day at a glance. Run yourself over with a car, you single bitch.
12.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃stop sleeping with old men┃ ┃to fill the void that your ┃ ┃father made when he left ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
13.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃some of y’all bout to be ┃ ┃real mad at me but ┃ ┃it must be said... ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
14.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔ＣＯ － ＳＴＡＲ ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃resisting your desires only ┃ ┃keeps you stagnant. The ┃ ┃stars say be horny today. ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
15.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃You will, as per usual, ┃ ┃disappoint your entire family ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
16.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃ 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃If youre reading this ┃ ┃you’ve been in a coma for ┃ ┃almost 20 years now ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯
So, in conclusion:
17.
╭━━━━━━━━━━━━╮ ┃🌔 CO — STAR ┃ ┃𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 ┃ ┃bitch ┃ ╰━━━━━━━━━━━━╯