What Career Should Your Cat Actually Have?
Your cat is skilled at loafing about, finding sunbeams, making you a paranoid prisoner in your own home, and/or destroying furniture. But unfortunately those just aren't paying positions.
Your cat lives the lifestyle of a true athlete: playing, eating, sleeping, repeat ad infinitum. As a soccer star, your cat will be able to pay off your mortgage AND play with balls all day!
Your cat takes life extremely seriously and will do what needs to be done to bring home the bacon, metaphorically (and maybe not metaphorically) speaking. Get your cat a nice suit, stat!
Your cat enjoys nothing more than hiding in corners, sneaking up on dust bunnies, and wearing disguises. Your cat is likely already putting those skills to use at the CIA, you just don't know it.
Your cat is so good at making biscuits that they do it in their (and your) sleep. They also love taking care of those they love, so baking sweet treats would be purrfect.
Your cat could be the next Lil Bub — what are you waiting for? He or she has obviously spent their entire life waiting for the spotlight to shine on them.
Your cat takes such good care of you that you don't even need a real doctor anymore. Your cat's first priority is your well-being but think of all the people they could help if they were a real M.D.!
Your cat is crazy 'bout that 'nip and a little crazy in general, so why not put that weird side to use and get 'em selling on the side? Maybe seeing the adverse effects of catnip will teach 'em something.
All this time you've thought your cat's fascination with paper bags, boxes, and string was just a random and inexplicable obsession, but IT'S ART, STUPID. Submit your cat's latest to your local galleries and they'll be blown away!