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Local Blogger Elucidates The Problem With "Deer Crossing" Signs

FINALLY. H/T to Katie Nono.

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Early this week, the Avon Lake, Ohio Patch site published the latest column from one of their regular contributors, Kathleen O'Brien Wilhelm. The writer had previously righteously railed against the deer population in the town, saying that she is tired of waiting for "these idiot animals to get off the road," and that she has had two cars damaged by deer. She begged the city council to get rid of the "dumb animals." But it's in her latest work that she articulates an exciting new suggestion to keep these accidents from happening...

Jamie McDonald / Getty Images

In her most recent column, O'Brien Wilhelm has figured out the real problem: Animals Can't Talk. She explains the real reason her cars were damaged, and how her city's government is wasting taxpayer dollars in the process: DEER CAN'T EVEN READ "DEER CROSSING SIGNS. Duh!

Signs that read "Deer Crossing" and the like are going to continue to pop up throughout our country including Avon Lake, but who are these signs for? Deer cannot read, do not obey the law and probably will cross where they wish. Although adorable companions, it is hard to remember the last time that the news reported an animal talking, thinking or providing significant input for the benefit of society. Yet, these signs cost taxpayers like so much of government."

O'Brien Wilhelm, having finally revealed the wasteful truth behing the "Deer Crossing" signs that dot our great country, goes on to explain why dogs, cats, whales, seals, and deer exist in the first place.

Dogs, cats, whales, seals and deer are animals that might enhance a human's life, but all cannot read, write or think. They are animals. Yes, people dress them, buy them extravagant blinge and do other strange things with them; however, animals are not human. They are on this earth like trees to make humans' lives better. As humans we must be kind to them, eat them when hungry, feed them when they are, but remember they are here to enhance our lives.

Some stuff about President Obama follows, and then our heroic columnist concludes her piece by making sure we understand that signs meant for humans, such as stop signs, are more than just "costly decorations." But these "Deer Crossing" signs meant for the obviously illiterate animals? WHAT A WASTE.

Andrew Winning / Reuters

P.S. This isn't the first time this has happened.