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30 Jokes About Being Bisexual That Low-Key Are Basically Me

I feel so attacked by this list I put together myself.

After being in the closet since I was 15, I finally came out as bisexual last year to everyone. It truly amazes me how much I relate to jokes about being bisexual, so here are my favorite ones:

1. Shego might have been one of my first crushes.

i love how all 3 of my bisexual awakenings give off the same energy

Twitter: @mythkillatears

2. Why can't we sit normally?

@pinkpunkpie / Via

3. The required uniform:

By 9pm tonight I shall finally become a cliche bisexual

Twitter: @cloudsapphic

4. *Bi panic ensues*

someone brought up the mummy today, and as a bisexual i am now required to rewatch it

Twitter: @bluejay_712

5. I watched this movie for the plot. The plot: Aubrey Plaza.

@caroldanversenthusiast / Via

6. Low-key just watched this last night, and I agree.

I wasn’t born bisexual I watched this movie

Twitter: @perrysburkhart

7. Why are we like this?!

pov you walk in on me, a bisexual, who knows how to use a standing desk

Twitter: @infantplanet

8. What? Not me. Okay, me.

bi women be juggling 5 men but throwing up tryna ask a girl how her day was

Twitter: @paigemc911

9. *Impulse-perms my hair and now wants a pixie*

bi culture is being permanently indecisive about your haircut

Twitter: @underthenettle

10. Where's the lie?

@wonkarration / Via

11. Don't show this to my fiancé.

i’m bisexual that means i’m attracted to girls who look like they just descended from heaven and boys who look like they just rose from the grave

Twitter: @kelllicopter

12. Truer words have not been spoken.

Some people think bisexuality is a 50/50 split between your attraction to men and women but for me it personally means I am resentfully attracted to men and terrified of women

Twitter: @kendrawcandraw

13. Every character in the Twilight Saga, tbh.

bisexual culture is being in love with the whole cast of a movie

Twitter: @ItsAlexJackson

14. Okay, I get it. Please stop attacking me.

Bi culture is saying I'M GAY because you're far too ashamed of yourself for liking men.

Twitter: @skeletology

15. Guess I'm in love with Mia Healey now.

@standingappablog / Via

16. Okay, you can show *this* to my fiancé.

Bi culture is hating men until you see a good looking man

Twitter: @roomonfireera

17. I thought I wanted to ~be~ them. Turns out I wanted to be ~with~ them.

bi culture is realizing u had a crush on a bunch of ur girl pals but u always just thought it was bc u REALLY wanted to be their friend

Twitter: @teIephoneswire

18. I don't need this.

Bi culture is listening to frank ocean alone at midnight and crying

Twitter: @ctrlblond

19. If you don't think this sounds amazing, you're so wrong.

@sapphistryyy / Via

20. Me, every day.

Bi update: Today, I'm feeling loudly bisexual.

Twitter: @biupdatebot

21. Wait...yes.

closeted bi culture is secretly making all your sims bisexual while being unaware of it as a child

Twitter: @iderysonyeo


happy #biweek from me, a girl in a relationship with a guy.. which dosnt make me any less bi

Twitter: @NixxNas

23. *Eyeroll*

"Pick a side." "You're just confused." "There's no such thing." #BiWeek

Twitter: @thatssoraven_ne

24. 👏 👏 👏

@bi-privilege / Via

25. We just admire from afar.

Bisexual culture is liking boys and girls and dating neither.

Twitter: @bonjourlapeen

26. I forgot my How to Seem More Bisexual for Dummies handbook.

“You don’t seem bi.” Oh shit sorry forgot my Bi.D. Wanna just watch me parallel park a hybrid while we listen to Lizzo or ??

Twitter: @molly7anne

27. Basically every movie I watch.

@justlgbtthings / Via

28. *Uncuffs jeans*

Trying to act straight at family gatherings like 😂😂😂 #GrowingUpBi

Twitter: @Chrisbohannon23

29. Not me with a nose ring...

bi culture is: -saying “im gay” -saying “i fucking love girls” -saying “i fucking love boys” -listening to Girls Like Girls by Hayley Kiyoko -listening to Girls/Girls/Boys by Panic! At The Disco -nose rings -went through an emo phase -“i’m gay”

Twitter: @nico_trxnch

30. It's always bread.

@undercoverlesbian / Via

And remember: