Let me grab my dick first!
"I felt so badass."
Am I allowed to ask a sex worker that?!
But this was not my only option
My bubbie was 75...she made out with my DJ
My armpits could kill a person!
Here's how to make your Instagrams worthy of an Oscar.
Because life hacks and office supplies are the best combo
You should say it without expecting anything in return
Why would you even think of this?!
I am so over him...who's that girl he's with?
What filter should I use on my selfie?
Don't tell the other reindeer about this!
Don't be distracted- oh hey, tumblr!
Hey...so can you watch my cat?
Because lesbians on Tinder are THE WORST!
Because strap-ons are f*cking cool.