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Life As An Australian Who Hates The Beach

The struggle is real.

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So it's summer in Australia and it is...

FOX

... Sweltering, actually.

Your friends are like: "Let's go to the beach!"

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Meanwhile, you're just there like...

ABC Family

Maybe if I don't say anything they'll forget I'm here and won't force me to go to the beach! You think to yourself.

ABC

No such luck. "Doesn't that sound like fun?!" They ask you excitedly.

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"Ummm... " You say, bracing yourself for what's about to happen.

USA Network

"I don't really like the beach!" You blurt out.

NBC

Your friends turn to you in bewilderment.

ABC Family

"... What?" They ask, confused.

FOX

You try to blow it off like it's no big deal.

Bravo Networks

But your friends aren't having it.

NBC

"You mean, you really don't like the beach?!" They ask, incredulous.

FOX

It's too late to go back on it, so you're just like...

Bravo Networks

"Maybe if you just came along you'd have fun!" your friends plead.

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You go to reply, but stop yourself just in time.

Bravo Networks

I'd rather shove bamboo under my fingernails. You think to yourself.

Lifetime

You choose to break the news in a gentler fashion.

FOX

You realise you're going to need to explain yourself.

Bravo Networks

"It's hot, okay?" You begin cautiously. "It's like, really hot, and it's always windy, so you get sand everywhere, and then you wash it off in the ocean but then it just sticks to you even more and it's hot and it's shit and I HATE IT!" You exclaim.

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Your friends are unsure how to react.

MTV

But it doesn't matter. The truth is out there.

Bravo Networks

Finally, you begin to feel good about coming clean as a beach-hating Aussie.

FOX

And that's A-Okay. Do you, beach haters! xo

Netflix