1. Firstly, the person looking for love gets taken to a sparse cafe that may or may not be in a leisure centre, to choose the menus for the week.
2. At least one of the menus will be filled with uncomfortable innuendo/puns.
3. And one of the potential dates will have chosen to cook something they learned to make “while travelling”.
4. The cooking will begin, and one of the dates will appear to have never been in their own kitchen before.
5. One of them will manage to fuck up something extremely basic.
6. While one date, who has never cooked before, will attempt to make something quite ambitious and it will completely fail.
This is a failed attempt at ginger syrup.
7. They will probably also attempt to "wing it" without looking at a recipie.
8. And a main course will end up looking like a steaming bowl of hot vomit.
9. One date will actually be a very good cook and make something extremely fancy, but they will basically never win.
10. Someone will have some difficulty opening a bottle of champagne.
11. Most of the dinner date conversations will have the stilted formality of a dental conference.
12. And there will be some sort of awkward innuendo despite a total lack of sexual chemistry.
13. One of the dates will be really excited about something that they have made.
14. And the person looking for love will usually hate it.
15. After dinner, one date will decide to provide some form of entertainment and it will be extremely uncomfortable.
16. Once the winner is decided the losers will get to eat the worst looking ready meals in the entire world.
17. Which is made more upsetting by the fact that they have had to dress up for the occasion.
And drink a really sad single serving bottle of wine.