48 Things That Mildly Thrill Everyone Who Works In An Office
"Treats from my holiday in the usual place."
1. When someone brings fancy snacks back from their holiday and leaves them in "the usual place".
2. When a person you hate brings cake in for their birthday and you eat it anyway.
3. When the aircon is actually the perfect temperature for the clothes you're wearing.
4. Arriving at the office at precisely 9am.
5. And leaving at EXACTLY 5pm.
6. Sneaking out of the office early and getting away with it.
7. When your boss is on holiday so you can coast the entire week.
8. When your desk buddy goes on holiday so you can spread all your shit out and create a mega desk.
9. Getting a desk where your computer faces the wall so nobody can spy on your screen.
10. Getting a much-coveted corner desk so you can fuck about.
11. Spending most of your time pissing around on the internet and getting thanked by your boss for "all your hard work".
12. "Working" from home.
13. Meetings where there are pastries and or biscuits.
14. When you get asked a question in a meeting and for once were paying attention so can give an answer.
15. Making subtle eye contact with your work BFF across a meeting room and knowing exactly what they mean because you can read each other's minds.
16. When someone cancels a meeting you didn't want to go to.
17. When you have to go on a mostly pointless away day but get to skive off work.
18. Any event where there is free food.
19. Any event where there is free booze.
20. When a new person walks in the office.
21. When a ~hot~ new person walks in and everyone immediately starts shamelessly messaging, like "WHO IS THAT?"
22. When you're allowed to play music in the office.
23. Leaving work in the middle of the day to go to the dentist and thus feeling extremely rebellious.
24. Pulling a sick day when you're not ~actually~ sick and spending the day eating biscuits and watching Netflix in your duvet sandwich.
25. Being utterly hungover at work and getting away with it.
26. Getting Amazon parcels delivered to your office and feeling like they are presents.
27. Chatting in the kitchen with your work pals for a risky amount of time.
28. Taking slightly longer than your allotted lunch hour.
29. When you pack something extremely exciting in your lunch box like Babybels or a new kind of yoghurt.
30. Eating your lunch at your desk with no interruptions from ANYONE.
31. Getting in early and discovering that nobody has taken your favourite mug yet.
32. When there is no queue at the coffee machine so you don't have to make dull small talk.
33. When someone else offers to make the tea and doesn't completely fuck it up.
34. When there's a fire drill and you get to stand around outside for a bit.
35. When you have holiday to use up and take a luxurious day off in the middle of the week.
36. When you actually remember there's a bank holiday and don't accidentally turn up to work.
37. When someone tells you about something genuinely interesting that they did at the weekend.
38. (Such as meeting a celebrity or getting arrested.)
39. When someone has a picture of their ugly kids on their desk and it's extremely entertaining to look at.
40. When someone brings their new baby into the office and they don't cry and make everyone nervous.
41. When a colleague starts a new fad diet and never mentions it to anyone.
42. When someone turns the Gchat to "off the record" and you know shit is about to go down.
43. Getting a Gchat notification from your work BFF, meaning they have gossip.
44. Going to work drinks where your boss gets smashed and tells you loads of salacious company secrets.
45. The prospect of snogging someone you fancy at the office party.
46. The gossip the day after the office party.
47. (Unless it's about you.)
48. When some idiot writes "happy birthday" in a "sorry you're leaving" card.