1. Tim Hortons.
This is like a posher version of Greggs where you can get such delicacies as Timbits, aka yummy donut holes.
2. Poutine.
There might be chips, gravy, and cheese in the UK but it’s just not the same as delicious cheese curds.
3. Cadbury Crispy Crunch.
Crispy Crunch is a yummy Cadbury chocolate bar made with a crispy flaky peanut filling, and you can’t get it in the UK, sadly. Another reason to move to Canada immediately.
4. Coffee Crisp.
This is a coffee and chocolate wafer bar which is literally heaven, and you can eat it for breakfast.
5. Harvey’s.
Harvey's is a burger fast-food place. It’s greasy and fast, but they put out the toppings in front of you like Subway does. AMAZING.
6. Bulk Barn.
It’s like Woolworths pick 'n' mix except you can get all kinds of food there. You can bulk buy cookies and all kinds of delicious sweets. Also you can make your own nut butter. What a wonderful place.
7. Colourful money.
British notes might be sort of colourful, but do they come in FIVE COLOURS, like actual Monopoly money? No, they're definitely not as fun. And Canadian money doesn’t fall apart when you accidentally drop it in a toilet because it’s made of plastic, not paper. What a world.
8. And glow-in-the-dark coins with dinosaurs on them.
What is the point of money if it doesn’t glow in the dark?
9. Ridiculously cool passports.
This is what Canadian passports look like under blacklight. Omg.
10. Caesars.
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These are basically a Canadian version of a Bloody Mary, and the perfect hangover cure. The only difference is that they tend to have more outrageous garnishes and are made with clam broth. Broth. Made of clams. Give it a chance.
11. Maple syrup everywhere.
Golden Syrup hasn’t got anything on delicious maple syrup. It’s even socially acceptable to walk down the street, eating maple syrup on a stick. And it’s natural so it’s basically healthy, right?
12. And especially maple cream cookies.
These are extremely delicious maple leaf-shaped cookies with cream filling. They're so damn sweet but so damn good.
13. Sexy town names.
Canada has a town for everyone! Why live in Leeds when you could live in a ~sexy~ Canadian town called Dildo, Spread Eagle, or Blow Me Down?
14. And also, this town name.
It's not just a phase, mum.
15. An underground city.
Because it gets so cold there, Montreal has an underground city where you can get around without going outside! The UK could probably do with that sort of thing in the rainy north.
16. Adorable crimes.
Aww!
17. A 10/10 hot Prime Minister.
Who also, like, cares.
18. Swiss Chalet sauce.
This is a gravy-like sauce that comes from a fast food restaurant and you dip your fries in. About 50% of Canadians hate it and the rest would drink a container full.
19. Hickory Sticks.
These are smoky, salty, and delicious crisps, which kind of look like chips.
20. Nanaimo bars.
These are kind of like fridge cake, except they also include chocolate ganache and vanilla custard butter cream. Omg.
21. BeaverTails.
These are fried pastries in the shape of a beaver’s tail covered with sugar and other awesome toppings. So good.
22. The phrase “shit disturber”.
Shit Disturber: A person who, because of their very nature, insults random people, picks fights, and likes to stir up trouble, aka “that prick from school”.
23. Raccoons.
They may be shit disturbers but they’re also beautiful trash pandas and we just need to give them a chance.
