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    22 Questions Not To Ask Your Queer Relatives This Christmas

    I don’t know, random cousin, how do YOU have sex?

    1. “Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?”

    Fox / Via

    Fine to ask if you're close and regularly talk about this sort of thing, not fine if you're not.

    If we DO have one, we'll tell you. Or maybe we won't.

    2. “Oh you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, that’s nice, so which one of you is the girl/guy?”

    Lionsgate / Via

    Erm. Well neither, that's kind of how it works.

    3. “But how do you have sex?”

    Walt Disney Pictures / Via

    Well how do you have sex, random cousin? See, it's not polite to ask that. And you know, you could just google it.

    4. “But you always seemed so girlie/masculine?”

    ABC / Via

    So what? Sexuality spans all kinds of people.

    5. “I thought you were bi, but you’re dating someone of the same sex, so are you gay now?”

    Paramount Pictures / Via

    That's. Not. How. It. Works.

    6. “Why do you all dress the same?”

    7. “Why do all gay men talk like this?” *does offensive lispy voice*

    CBS / Via

    They absolutely don't.

    8. “You’re gay, right, so are you into this chemsex thing?”

    The CW / Via

    Are YOU into chemsex?

    9. “Why do all lesbians have short hair?”

    Fox / Via

    I don't have short hair do I?

    10. “Why are you attracted to girls that look like boys? Why not just go out with a guy?”

    Fox / Via Twitter: @cbreezybby_

    Because androgyny is hot.

    11. “Oh did you hear *insert name of distant family friend* came out too? You guys should meet up.”

    Logo / Via

    No. Although I might stalk them on Facebook…

    12. “My godson/goddaughter is also gay/bi etc. do you want their number?”

    Paramount Pictures / Via

    No thank you please don't try and set me up unless I ask you to.

    13. “So how do you know if someone is gay/lesbian/bi/queer/trans?”


    You don't. I mean, you can ask them when you're friends, but it's definitely not polite as an opening question.

    14. "Why isn’t it ok for me to call people *insert word* if you can say it?”

    Logo / Via

    ~Because~ they're reclaimed words.

    15. “Is it true that all lesbians are vegetarians?”

    ABC / Via

    Is it true that all straight women eat meat?

    16. “Is *insert name of random celebrity* gay?”

    Fox / Via

    Maybe, maybe not. We're not in a secret club where we automatically get told who all the queer celebrities are, sadly.

    17. *While watching Christmas TV* “Ooh are they your type?”

    Spike / Via

    This is just awkward for everyone involved please stop.

    18. “Now that equal marriage is legal are you going to get married?”

    Fox Searchlight Pictures / Via

    Sure if I find the right person. But like, no more so than a straight person.

    19. “So grandchildren are off the cards then?”

    BBC / Via

    Not necessarily, but that's not really a polite question.

    20. “But how would you have kids? Would you adopt?”

    Walt Disney Pictures / Via

    Let me ask you a bunch of really detailed questions about how you conceived your kids. No tell me. All the details, please.

    21. “Don't you think a child should have a mum and a dad?”

    Netflix / Via

    Nope. Look at all the divorced straight parents out there.

    22. "Do you want some more dessert?"

    CBS / Via

    Don't worry, it's always ok to ask this.

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