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14 Things You Did To Look Cool As Teens That Aren't Cool Now

"Yeah, I nicked this vodka from my parents house." "Wow, that's kind of a dick move."

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1. Claiming to have a boyfriend/girlfriend in “another town”.

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Why it seemed cool then: It indicated that you *might* have got to third base with someone.

Why it's not cool now: It would be pretty damn obvious. Like, "Ooh yeah, just going away this weekend to visit my boyfriend in another town who absolutely exists and definitely isn't just a stock photo I found on Google."

2. Drinking large amounts of cheap cider/beer in parks.

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Why it seemed cool then: Being able to neck four cans in the space of an hour without vomiting was the indicator of the seasoned and experienced underage drinker.

Why it's not cool now: Drinking in parks as an adult is pretty much a sign that your life isn't going too well (unless it's wine or posh cider and you're having a picnic, then it's fine).

3. Stealing booze from your parents' house.

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Why it seemed cool then: Bringing spirits you stole from your parents to a party seemed cool when nobody had actually tried hard liquor before (even if they had claimed to). The kid that did this usually drank it all really quickly and then vomited everywhere.

Why it's not cool now: "Yeah I nicked this vodka out of my mum's booze cabinet."

"Wow, that's kind of a dick move."

4. Smoking in the school toilets.

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Why it seemed cool then: Those kids at every school who slyly smoked were generally completely terrifying but you still kind of wanted to be in their group.

Why it's not cool now: Well, it's illegal for a start, and it's absolutely gross.

5. Pretending to have lost your virginity.

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Why it seemed cool then: Because claiming to have had sex was grown-up and glamorous.

Why it's not cool now: Everyone's real virginity-losing stories are basically awkward and embarrassing and only to be shared after at least three bottles of wine. And lying about it if you haven't is RIDICULOUS.

6. Smoking weed on school premises.

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Why it seemed cool then: This was a blatant breach of school rules so those hardcore stoner kids seemed super badass, even if they *were* mostly failing.

Why it's not cool now: Yeah, doing drugs at work is going to get you fired, *especially* if you brag about it to all your colleagues.

7. Setting off the fire alarm for the lols.

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Why it seemed cool then: Because you got to miss at least half an hour of class while the school sorted it out.

Why it's not cool now: You'll probably end up staying late at work to catch up with the work you missed because you were standing outside your building for ages. Also, it's cold outside.

8. Swearing at an authority figure.

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Why it seemed cool then: Being rude to a teacher gave you the ultimate "hard kid who doesn't answer to anyone" status.

Why it's not cool now: It pretty much just means you're an arsehole. And you'll probably be arrested if you do it to a police officer.

9. Not trying with any of your work.

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Why it seemed cool then: Never really bothering with your schoolwork was for some ridiculous reason cool.

Why it's not cool now: "Yeah, I hardly did any preparation for this presentation."

"Wow, you're really bad at your job."

10. Flagrantly breaching the dress code.

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Why it seemed cool then: Rolling your skirt up, not tucking your shirt in, or wearing something with an offensive slogan on it screamed, "Hey, I don't care about your rules, SOCIETY."

Why it's not cool now: It would just look hilarious if men in offices started making their ties really short and wearing "Fuck the Police" hoodies. Actually, please do this.

11. Setting fire to deodorant on your hand, and other ridiculously dangerous things involving fire.

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Why it seemed cool then: Because it involved fire and DANGER and therefore coolness.

Why it's not cool now: Holy shit, this is dangerous. Nobody is going to be impressed with self-inflicted burns, even if the flames did look sort of cool for a few seconds.

12. Bragging about all the clothes your parents bought for you.

Why it seemed cool then: It meant this person always had the latest Abercrombie Hoody that everyone coveted. Why it's not cool now: As an adult it's not so impressive to have your parents buy all your clothes for you.
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Why it seemed cool then: It meant this person always had the latest Abercrombie Hoody that everyone coveted.

Why it's not cool now: As an adult it's not so impressive to have your parents buy all your clothes for you.

13. Going on about much pocket money you get.

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Why it seemed cool then: Because there was always that one rich kid in your class who got a ridiculous amount of pocket money that made everyone jealous because they didn't have to save up to get the new Pokémon game.

Why it's not cool now: Bragging about your allowance from your parents as an adult. Nope.

14. Staying up really late.

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Why it seemed cool then: No fucking idea, but it always seemed like a contest to see who stayed up the latest on a school night. Those kids who had no official bedtime just seemed way more edgy than those who had to have lights out by 10pm.

Why it's not cool now: Adults brag about who gets the most sleep, because sleeping is the best thing.