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Excuse Me, Schools: Why The Hell Is March-Past Still A Thing?

Educators – I'm sure there was a better use of A THOUSAND HOURS of my formative years than THIS shit.

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HOW WAS IT OKAY TO MAKE CHILDREN WALK BACK AND FORTH TO BEATING DRUMS IN THE SCORCHING HEAT?

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Not to mention the MANY times you had to wait longer in the heat because someone fainted during practice.

And fair enough. Because we spent A LOT of time doing it. A SHIT-TON, as they say. Let me substantiate my claim with some math.

No. of hours spent practising marching around your school:

• Four months per year = 80 working days.

• One hour per day x 80 = 80 hours per year.

• 80 hours x 12 years = 960 hours.

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NINE HUNDRED AND SIXTY HOURS. OF A CHILD'S FORMATIVE YEARS. SPENT LIFTING ONE LEG AFTER THE OTHER. GOOD GOD.

Was it to instil a sense of discipline?

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UM. You already taught us that by making us show up to school at 8 a.m. every day wearing a frickin' uniform. Is there need for MORE order within that Mecca of orderliness?

Why have I been so well-trained in saluting on command? WHEN IN MY ADULT LIFE DO I NEED THE FULLY DEVELOPED REFLEX OF LOOKING RIGHT WHEN SOMEONE SAYS "EYES RIGHT"?

Thank you for your time. [Does deep-breathing for 960 hours to recover from this rage.]

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