2. He posted this message to the Confession Subreddit:
I will not reveal who I’ve worked with or what I’ve starred in obviously, as I don’t want to be identified. I love my career, and I know I would lose my leading man status if I ever came out. I feel terribly guilty about many different things.
First of all, I feel like I’m misleading my fans. I know a lot of women watch my movies to watch me, and part of that is fantasy, and I feel like it’s all based on a lie. They do a lot market analysis in Hollywood. I get told about which demographics I do well with, and I feel like I’m misleading so many people, or letting them down.
I am dating another well known personality, and we’ve been publicly together for a while now. I know she expects to get married, the press expect us to get married, but of course this would be a great disservice to her. Truth be told I think she knows. She is a wonderful woman and a wonderful person and I don’t deserve someone as loving and trusting in my life, and I truly do love her, but I’m not in love with her, and sex with her, despite her beauty, is difficult for me.
I also feel terribly guilty because I know there are so many gay kids out there and I feel like by not coming out, and not providing that public display of being gay and being successful I’m letting them down. Public figures like Ellen DeGeneres coming out when I was younger made a huge difference to me, and I feel like I should be paying it forward, but I’m too afraid of my whole life being ruined.
I’ve only told a few people. I’ve been with two men since my career has started. Both have been, thankfully, very discrete. My two best friends from before I became mainstream know, and have been supportive. I’ve told two gay actors who have come out because I trusted they would keep it to themselves, having been in the same position. They were comforting and told me to do what I needed to do, but it didn’t assuage my guilt at all. I tested the water with my agent, who basically told me “Faggots don’t make it in this town,” and then went on to basically explain that he would never represent a gay man because the effort versus the money just makes it not worth it to him. It frankly terrifies me. I just wanted to get it out there.
3. First reaction:
Yea right buddy, and I’m the queen of England.
4. Reddit users responded with support, even giving him advice:
Neil Patrick Harris stars as a guy who has sex with hundreds of women and he’s gay. Come out. Ellen’s been running the water for a while, and it’s warm now.
Talk with the two open actors about who they have to represent them. Work with their agents to see if they will pick you up, then fire your jackass current agent. Along with that, spread the word about the asshole agent so others steer clear. People like that will continue to prosper in Hollywood until you, the real talent, stand up to them.
If you’re worried about your perception from your fans. Don’t! If you must, use what you’ve posted and how it made/makes you feel. Be honest with your fan base, and the only thing that will happen is more people will respect you. If people hate you because of who you are, do you really want them to be your fan in the first place?
It’s a sad reality that this is true. You really have two true options. Depending on who you are and how you handle things can make the difference. For these purposes I’m going to dwell on the pessimistic side, as that’s what I’m sure you’re most worried about.
1: Continue to live the lie, star in movies, make money, live the famous life, and be unhappy because you can’t be who you truly are. This leads to major depression, misery, physiological issues, and everyone has seen where this leads.
2: Come out, deal with losing your agent,end up out of the business, but be happy. Live the way you are, no lies, no secrets, find a SO, and be yourself.
8. When users suggested he simply fire his agent, the mystery man explained:
This is just how agents work in Hollywood. Agents don’t represent you because they like you. They represent you because they can make money off you. And you accept that because they find you steady work. When an agent is a “power agent” (believe it or not your agent’s name alone can get you a job when you’re breaking out) they can often be so influential that if you leave them they can also break your career. I’m kind of stuck unless another big agent takes me.
9. Wait… what if this guy is the real deal?
11. But seriously, should gay leading men in Hollywood have to hide in order to stay successful?
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