1. Lindsay Lohan’s “I clearly take the severity of my crime very seriously. If my word isn’t enough, just look at the severity of my cheekbones” strategic contouring
2. Taylor Momsen’s “I’m so tough that I can give myself a black eye” smokey eye
3. Kelly Osbourne’s “I got cast on Fashion Police because I clearly have no place being on Makeup Police” hair, lip, and foundation choices
4. Kris Kardashian’s “I love being with my family sooo much that if my face wasn’t frozen, it would look like I loved being with my family so much” Botox treatment
6. Ross Geller’s “These Whitestrips are so comfortable that I started watching Jurassic Park and completely forgot I had them on” teeth whitening attempt
7. Lady Gaga’s “Sometimes I like to dunk my face in a bucket of tie-dye paint” eyebrow and lip color
8. Christina Aguilera’s “I just got back from a vacation on the sun” spray tan
9. Nicole Kidman’s “I’m completely oil-free and photo ready as long as the camera doesn’t have a flash” over-powdering
10. Leighton Meester’s “I let my 5 year old niece do my makeup today” color explosion
11. Mischa Barton’s “I’d like to look consistently embarassed for the entire evening” blush treatment
12. Drew Barrymore’s “Yikes, I really didn’t think this through” yellow eyeshadow
13. Kim Kardashian’s “I found this color in my cabinet from that year I spent in a dark Alaskan cave” foundation
14. Carrie Bradshaw’s “I’m getting married today, but also have a gut feeling I’ll be getting stood up at the altar” frightened wedding look
15. Eva Longoria’s “I didn’t sleep at all last night and this seemed like the best solution” concealer
16. Tyra Banks’ “Would you believe my electric went out right before I hit the red carpet?! I didnt want to stand anyone up so I just did my makeup in the dark” eye shadow
17. Kat Von D’s “I’m Kat Von D, so this is not only socially acceptable, but expected of me” makeup and tattoo choices
- Trump's supporters are just as frustrated as he is about not getting things done — and they're blaming everyone but Trump.
- The National Enquirer tabloid is growing by speaking to an audience ignored by mainstream media and backing Trump.
- Furniture stores are being reshaped by a simple fact: many young people simply aren't in the market for their stuff anymore ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- Model Bella Hadid, who promoted Fyre Festival on her social media, spoke out about the chaos and apologized to ticket holders.