47 Things That Annoy The Ever-Loving Shit Out Of Everyone From Newcastle
Seriously, we don't know Ant or Dec.
1. The look of bewilderment on people's faces when you wear a coat.
2. People asking what part of Scotland you're from.
3. Or when they do the accent back at you.
4. Especially when non-Geordies scream "why aye man" in your face when they find out where you're from.
5. Having to celebrate every achievement in life with the Alan Shearer one-hand-in-the-air goal celebration.
6. Geordie Shore.
7. When bands tour Britain and you have to travel to Glasgow or Manchester to go see them.
8. Or having to go to gigs at The Stadium of Light.
9. Having people ask if you went to the Grove.
10. Never being trusted to play paint ball.
11. Having to explain you don't know Ant or Dec.
12. But you did once meet Donna Air. No-one remembers Donna Air.
13. The Tyne and Wear Metro system.
14. Metro inspectors (checkies), even when you legitimately have a ticket and didn't vault over the barrier.
15. The way people seem to lose all common sense as they get to the Metro ticket barrier and appear to just forget how they work.
16. The constant let downs of supporting Newcastle United Football Club.
17. Having to explain you are still technically a Geordie when you're from just outside the city centre.
18. Having to work in a soul-crushing call centre because the accent is so friendly here that there's now loads.
20. Not being able to tell your mate "she's lying" without finishing off the whole of that Jimmy Nail song.
21. Wearing shiny shoes and getting called "Crocodile Shoes."
22. Stag and Hen dos from every other city in fancy dress on a Friday night.
23. And the fact it's impossible to to walk trough town without craving a Greggs.
24. The radgedness of drinking down the Bigg Market.
25. And the struggle of getting a late night McDonald's at the Bigg Market branch.
26. When people from other cities don't know what a stotty is.
27. Or what pease pudding is.
28. Or a saveloy dip.
29. Getting the bus to the Metro Centre.
30. The cost of the train to London.
31. The Megabus to London.
32. Not really knowing much about who the man Grey's Monument is for, other than, "oh, it's the tea dude".
33. People not recognising that Newcastle has incredible art and culture.
34. Dry chips.
35. Trying to walk along the diamond strip without getting knocked into the road.
36. The Baltic and Sage Gateshead being over the water.
37. When people get the accent so wrong on telly.
38. The fact they fixed the City Pool sign so it doesn't say "City Poo" anymore.
39. That there's ALWAYS road works.
40. Long words never quite sounding right in a Geordie accent.
41. Learning to like the taste of Newcastle Brown Ale.
42. Going to watch a film at Empire on a Friday night and making your way through the crowds drinking there at The Gate.
43. Shops just up and moving to new locations.
44. When you get asked if Middlesbrough or Sunderland are in Newcastle.
45. People now knowing Grey Street was voted one of Britain's most picturesque.
46. Always having one mate who fits every Geordie cliché.
47. Knowing that no matter where you go, or where you live, no other city will ever compete to Newcastle.