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    18 Jokes From Women This Week That Are Just. Too. Good.

    "Don’t think of it as dating ladies think of it as creating a lifelong audience for your Instagram story."

    1.

    Y’ALL THIS IS MY FAMILY GROUP CHAT SOMEONE PLEASE DIG MY GRAVE

    2.

    So I thought this guy was checking me out at the gym....Then he comes up to me and says “hey can I tell you something ? Your form is trash, engage your core.” Humbled the shit out of me. Lmaoooooo

    3.

    some of y’all get your personalities from the internet and it SHOWS https://t.co/ZrUskRdfOX

    4.

    it has never once occurred to a man to wipe down a surface

    5.

    You can make jokes when you stop charging $20 for a sponge https://t.co/BLy8E7AEne

    6.

    7.

    why are crime documentary narrators such dickheads???? I’m watching one & this nigga said “she clocked out, but little did she know she wouldn’t clock back in” she DIED

    8.

    dating in your twenties is just saying “when works for you” back and forth until one of you gets back with your ex

    9.

    something wrong with my cousin

    10.

    i was just trying to have a relaxing morning by the pool

    11.

    the word “y’all” - gender neutral - chaotic good - yeehaw vibes

    12.

    black parent: *plays old school music for 18 years straight* their kids: *play the same songs on their own* black parent: WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS!!!!¡

    13.

    Don’t think of it as dating ladies think of it as creating a lifelong audience for your Instagram story

    14.

    i cannot believe this is my city’s news station...i cannot believe this is real

    15.

    I texted my husband “I want pizza but I need to go to the gym” in the hopes that he would try and steer me back on the right path and motivate me to go to the gym. But instead he replied “Same, let’s get pizza” and so yes it is true that marriage makes you fat

    16.

    The EXCESS in this photo! White AND red wine! Green AND purple grapes! Eight kinds of cheese! And the piece de resistance...not one, but TWO phones

    17.

    Someone on Instagram asked to buy nudes from me, and I was so offended. I’ll say it loud, and I’ll say it proud: I only send nudes for FREE to men who have TRICKED ME into thinking we have an emotional CONNECTION

    18.

    my students just asked if ive ever seen a dinosaur ... alive. everybody bout to get a F