Comedy·Posted on Mar 2, 201926 Jokes From Women That ACTUALLY Made Me Laugh Out Loud"Me, in hell: I was told there would be a “special” place for me?"by Shyla WatsonBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. Un Poco Loco @Bexyful Am I the most attractive woman out there ? Of course not. But do I have a good personality ? Well, no. But do I wake up every day and try to be the best person that I can be ? Also no. 02:16 AM - 24 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Sarah Wainschel @Swainsch Two girls greeting each other after studying abroad for three months 01:01 PM - 26 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Jen Abidor @abidorable Who the fuck didn’t name these S’moreos? https://t.co/XU4hhOCCvy 01:17 AM - 28 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. Cats Against Humanity @CatsVsHumanity Me: Age is just a number My body: And today you're 85 lol 02:30 PM - 02 Mar 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Dana Schwartz @DanaSchwartzzz it's me, your dead wife :( please reminisce about me while drinking from a glass of whiskey at 11am!!! 12:56 AM - 27 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. Necro Mami Ⓥ @frankenfemme_ This is the twin that got the most nutrients https://t.co/uMbP9ATxO1 04:16 AM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. Chloe Bryan @chloebryan same 06:22 PM - 27 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. gissell @GIZZZYO my cousin has a michael myers mask and he can’t stop wearing it 02:18 AM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. crissy @crissymilazzo thinking that people want to steal your boyfriend is a mental disorder. no one wants your boyfriend. have you had a boyfriend? exactly. no one wants it. calm down 06:12 PM - 01 Mar 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. T E E @BITCH_I_LOOKGUD I heard my kids joking on each other in the other room and someone yelled out “that’s why you look like mommy in the morning” Wait a fucking minute NOW ! Lmaoo 04:12 PM - 27 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. AA @allisona15 someone tell Baby Gap it’s not their fault https://t.co/bxQAeZqrYu 11:57 PM - 28 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. HONEY 🍯 @Ahenewaaa STOP blocking your momma from your posts... let her see the hoe she raised 04:19 AM - 26 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. maria ゚✧* @ruinsmore the jonas brothers are coming back and my dad told me straight to my face, “you will not drag me to another one of their concerts after what happened when you were 6” long story short, the jonas brothers opened up for hannah montana and i threw up when i saw nick 01:46 AM - 01 Mar 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. Alison Segel @OnlineAlison Are these the only two options 05:53 PM - 27 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Chantel Houston @ChantelHouston Me: *sets away message* ~*~i LiKe U tHe WaY u R. ~*~wHeN wE’rE dRiViNg iN uR cAR Also me: *is 13 and has no friends that can drive and definitely has no friends that have a car and has never had a real crush and doesn’t really know what this new song is about* 08:10 AM - 26 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. Alice Wetterlund @alicewetterlund Me, in hell: I was told there would be a “special” place for me? 04:31 PM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. ♡ @araslanian_ this dude outside of home depot asked me where he could get crystals and i had a necklace with an amethyst on it and i said “you can have this one” and he said “crystal meth bitch” 10:52 PM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. j @khodega me: :( scented candle: * * . * . * . * . * . * . . * * . * 🕯 *. *. . *. * . * * . *. * . . * . * . . me: :) 06:23 AM - 24 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. lauren scharf @LLcoolscharf 🎶Tell me something girl... 03:19 AM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. Sara Morse @saramorseyy dating my last boyfriend was like being on the bachelor but not knowing I was on the bachelor 01:35 AM - 27 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. hannah @mmithannah they both look like they’re at a harry styles costume party https://t.co/PSpwA1PShX 02:50 AM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 22. Abby Norman @abbymnorman *me whenever something good happens* 11:45 AM - 25 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 23. trip @chovvder no one: me: so you hate me 07:59 AM - 27 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 24. d dizzle @kudosdani my friends: *waiting for me to tell my story* me before I even start the story: 11:50 PM - 28 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 25. Audrey Porne @AudreyPorne what straignt men wanted in 1979: women who like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain what straight men want in 2019: must be ten times hotter than me but NOT know it. can fit entire meatball sub in mouth but NOT in a slutty way. SIZE TWO. LOVES sex but is a VIRGIN. 08:19 PM - 23 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 26. K @kayladoing okay 07:54 PM - 24 Feb 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite