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I Couldn't Stop Laughing At These Tweets, And I Bet You Won't Be Able To Either

"Love is cool but have you ever stepped on a scale and weighed less than you expected?"

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I’m opening a new gym called ‘resolutions’ it will have fitness equipment in for the first two weeks then I will tu… https://t.co/VOhU5pQzin

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SCHOOL IS STARTING AGAIN SOON SO I AM ASKING ALL DRIVERS TO PLEASE PLEASE WATCH FOR US STUDENT PEDESTRIANS AND HIT US AT FULL SPEED THANKS

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The next idiot that tells me to "stick to acting" should be forced to watch From Justin to Kelly until they agree I… https://t.co/fSFI1V1GQt

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Love is cool but have you ever stepped on a scale and weighed less than you expected?

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Bring back crying-in-the-rain-to-get-your-girl-back R&B

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come on eileen: playing depression: cancelled climate change: ended war: finished wig: flew

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I love seeing my friends on vacation. I watch their stories and like their pictures all happy. I also think I’m wit… https://t.co/COldMw9ytB

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I’ve got this video earlier today and hell I want this girl to go viral! #memeworker

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How will the Bachelor ever choose which Blonde Ombre Woman to make his wIFE?????

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Also I just learned that “YT people” is Youtube people and not internet slang for “white people” I thought the y wa… https://t.co/nR70UKw0Qx

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The mom I babysat for on NYE came home hammered as her husband did everything in his power to hold her up. She then… https://t.co/fdnrMRfTwR

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This Barbie character reminds me of someone... 🤔😂

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.@iamcardib if you ever need a Lie Detector Test or have more relationship drama...you know you can always call Uncle Maury!

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So my brother texts me and says “guess what I done today” and proceeds to tell me he surprised his wife with 2 alpa… https://t.co/JocgxAoU6l

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“I’m a foodie.” me: oh yeah wow, you like food? like the stuff that sustains life and that no one could survive wi… https://t.co/tEFzYed4Al

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McDonald’s leader Ronald just stated he has a “burger on his desk at all times”. Will someone from his big shoed, r… https://t.co/quqyZy12GV

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Y'all can keep your Netflix & Chill, I'm trying to

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I met someone today who worked for Triple A and I thought they said Chick-fil-A so after 15 min of talking, I asked… https://t.co/6PvZ9dECHp

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The first guess from one of my 1st graders was “death” and such an awed, somber, reflective hush fell over the clas… https://t.co/gP4YmJkvTY

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