Response to Send This To Your Parents To Explain iOS 7:
Send this to your punk kids who aren’t nearly as smart as they think they are, using technology their parents invented.
1) Yes the icons are ugly but we didn’t think you could understand anything more sophisticated. Some people appreciate a classic little black dress, some are ok with shiny day-glo colors.
2) Change is better when it IMPROVES something. If you’re bored, make a difference, don’t spray paint a Picasso.
3) You can’t customize the control center but you’re probably too busy tweeting to notice. You aren’t in control of your own life anyway. You won’t need it.
4) Closing apps is now silly. It’s different but not better. You probably won’t mind. All that sweeping will make you feel like you’re actually doing something productive.
5) Camera isn’t better but it’s easier for kids who just want to photograph themselves in the mirror for instagram.
6) Spotlight is less productive but we know how you hate to think so since it’s the same motion as control center, you won’t have to tax your brain to remember two things.
7) Notification center also wasn’t improved but changed to appeal to those who are easily bored. Customization is limited but again, since you don’t have need for more than twitter, FB or candy crush, it’ll work for ya.
All in all, IOS 7 will appeal to those easily entertained by shiny objects. You’ll heart it.