1. The week after your break up, it starts to set in. You've resolved to binge eating sour straws and watching Titanic 20+ times.
You finally realize that Rose is a selfish bitch who could've shared that measly wooden plank with Jack.
2. Your house/bed looks like a cesspool of sorrow and a Goodwill donation center.
3. Let the gorging of ice cream commence! Or at least something close to it.
4. You don't want to go to work but you have to go anyways.
5. That one jackass can't believe you've broken up with your significant other. You convince them and yourself that you hate your ex.
Respect the Ocean. Respect it.
7. You decide it's a good idea to go say "Hi!" to your ex and someone sane stops your dumb ass.
10. You end up dressing up somewhere between a colorblind hobo and Bjork. And some fucker calls you out on it.
12. And you need a pick me up, of course junk food is the answer.
13. You're feeling optimistic and get back on your feet!
14. Single life is setting in.
15. Normal life resumes but dear god you can't bear to see happy people.
16. Sadness returns and you don't give a shit about anything else except food.
Don't fuck with a sad/hungry person
18. Your friends are tired of consoling you, but they continue to do so anyways.
20. You delve into weird activities to preoccupy your time/distract you.
Underwater basket weaving anyone?