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30 Stages Of A Break Up According To Mindy

Just when you think you've hit rock bottom...

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1. The week after your break up, it starts to set in. You've resolved to binge eating sour straws and watching Titanic 20+ times.

You finally realize that Rose is a selfish bitch who could've shared that measly wooden plank with Jack.

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5. That one jackass can't believe you've broken up with your significant other. You convince them and yourself that you hate your ex.

Respect the Ocean. Respect it.

6. You reminisce about the good times you had together.

Big Four

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9. Your friends convince you to go out, and you do but....

10. You end up dressing up somewhere between a colorblind hobo and Bjork. And some fucker calls you out on it.

11. You cry because nothing is going right.

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16. Sadness returns and you don't give a shit about anything else except food.

Don't fuck with a sad/hungry person

17. You need to clean your room/house and find something of theirs and the floodgates open.

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19. You decide to get naked wasted alone!!!

20. You delve into weird activities to preoccupy your time/distract you.

Underwater basket weaving anyone?

23. You convinced your inebriated self that you're getting naked tonight! I got my bros/hos, look like a rock solid 10, and "Ignition" just came on...Flame On bitchez!

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24. You realize you got naked with some weird fuck and question your taste in wo/men.

27. You decide against it and go have a drink or 3...or 7.

28. You make a pact/goal with another single friend.

29. You finally move on and kick him/her to the curb!

Good for you!!

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