A Paris Zoo Just Introduced "The Blob" And I'm Convinced It Will Destroy Us All
Beware the blob.
As if 2019 couldn't get any weirder, a zoo in Paris just unveiled a terrifying new organism dubbed "the blob."
AFP News Agency/BuzzFeed / Via youtube.com
This is it. Seems innocent enough, right?
Well, let me tell you a few things about this blob, and only then can you decide if I'm being dramatic, K?
Paramount
First things first, this blob has almost 720 sexes.
GiantBomb
This actually isn't scary at all and really interesting and cool. Just like the rest of us, this blob can identify in any way it sees fit.
BUT it also has no mouth, no eyes, and no stomach, and yet it can still DETECT AND DIGEST FOOD???
NBC
I'm sorry, but how??
It can move WITHOUT LEGS OR WINGS.
Fox
So it just sludges along, slowly but surely coming for us all.
It can heal itself in just TWO MINUTES after being cut in half.
Bravo
What kind of sci-fi nonsense...?
And last but not least, despite the fact that is has no brain, this blob is actually able to LEARN.
Logo
According to Bruno David, director of the Paris Museum of Natural History, "if you merge two blobs, the one that has learned will transmit its knowledge to the other."
!!!!!
Now, I'm not saying this blob is actually an alien sent from outer space to destroy us all...
Paramount
But I'm not NOT saying that, either!!!!
Paramount
PS: The blob is named after the 1958 sci-fi movie The Blob, which is about a giant blob that comes from outer space and consumes everything in its path. Coincidence???
In conclusion, if I ever stick my foot or hand out over the edge of my bed again, I'm not going to be afraid of monsters. I'm going to be afraid of the blob.
NewZee PK / Via youtube.com
Good day.