Unsurprisingly, the one thing I’ve been rebuked for the most in my life so far is not having watched The Lion King. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via tumblr.com Before you scream, "INFIDEL", I admit I screwed up. Watched too much Dragon Ball Z. Got obsessed with papier-mâché. Just so many reasons, man. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via pinterest.com In fact, the only Disney movie I watched when I was a child was Hercules, and that too because I'd heard and loved the soundtrack already. I am aware that some terrible tragedy occurs in the movie, but I haven't the vaguest idea what it is. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via wordpress.com I'd also like to disclose that I know of only a couple of moments from the film through internet memes, like the "everything the light touches is our kingdom" thing, and some monkey dude holding a lion cub perilously over a cliff. LET'S DO THIS! 1. I already like this music more than the Frozen soundtrack because the Frozen soundtrack was basically horseshit songwriting. Walt Disney Pictures Thus proving that even when it comes to the music of Disney movies, the '90s was where it was really at. 2. So this monkey chief dude was hobbling around on a walking stick a moment ago, but suddenly he can hold a newborn baby over a damn cliff? Seems shady. Walt Disney Pictures Walt Disney Pictures 3. Zazu giving me some mad #AlliterationGoals. Walt Disney Pictures 4. Feel like Scar is the antagonist, but the dude is pretty darn FABULOUS. Don't you deny it. Walt Disney Pictures 5. There's that impostor of a monkey again, doing grafitti without his goddamn walking stick. I don't trust this punk. Walt Disney Pictures 6. So THIS is that famous, overmemed scene. Pretty grand, I'll give it that. Tempted to google what the shadowy place is, though. Walt Disney Pictures Scar is me at every social gathering ever. Walt Disney Pictures 7. THAT DARK PLACE IS OBVIOUSLY NOT AN ELEPHANT GRAVEYARD SIMBA. DON'T DO DUMB SHIT. LISTEN TO YOUR PARENTS. GO TO SCHOOL. Walt Disney Pictures 8. Yup, these are definitely some of the better Disney songs I've heard. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via genius.com Riiiiiiiight up there with Hercules. Maybe even better? I dunno. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 9. Sexual tension between Simba and Nala making me feel awkward. Walt Disney Pictures 10. Holy shit that IS an elephant graveyard. I stand corrected. And it is creepy as hell. Walt Disney Pictures 11. These hyenas remind me of Ed, Edd, and Eddy. Especially Ed, the hyena on the far right, who is basically Ed. This can't be a coincidence. Walt Disney Pictures I am Ed the hyena, unable to contain my laughter in inappropriate situations. Ed the hyena is me. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF gifmania.co.uk 12. Thank god for Mufasa. Seriously though, Simba. You done fucked up. LISTEN TO YOUR DAD. Walt Disney Pictures Walt Disney Pictures 13. Gratuitous cruelty to animated zebras. Where the fuck is PETA when you need them? Walt Disney Pictures 14. Ohhhh shit. Scar not content with being the sass king of the jungle he wants to be real king this will not end well. Walt Disney Pictures Dude's got some mad pipes though. I'd definitely attend the opening night of "Scar: The Musical." Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via static3.businessinsider.com 15. Seriously, has anyone taken notes on Scar's pun game? My man is KILLING. Walt Disney Pictures 16. OK, I stopped typing for the last few minutes because I had my balls in my mouth for that entire stampede. That was some serious shit. Walt Disney Pictures 17. I feel like this is where I'm going to stop liking Scar. Walt Disney Pictures NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Walt Disney Pictures 18. Mufasa is dead?!!?! HE DIED?!!?!?!??! JUST LIKE DUMBLEDORE?!!?!??!?!!?!??! :'( Walt Disney Pictures 19. Feeling unusually upset right now. Wasn't expecting to be hit by such strong feels. Walt Disney Pictures FUCK YOU SCAR. Walt Disney Pictures FUCK YOU SCAR. Walt Disney Pictures FUCK YOU SCAR. :'( Walt Disney Pictures YOU EVIL, ELOQUENT BASTARD. Walt Disney Pictures FUCK YOU. Walt Disney Pictures 20. For a schemer like Scar, he sure does skimp on the quality of his henchmen. Walt Disney Pictures Letting Simba go is going to bite you in the ass guaranteed. 21. Not sure why the lions are making such a big fuss about a lion-hyena collab. THESE hyenas look like they can get shit done. Walt Disney Pictures Almost forgot about this dude. Cutting him some slack because I feel he's going to drop some Yoda shit on this bitch. Walt Disney Pictures 22. I know this is Timon and Pumbaa because I had them on a pencil box when I was 8 or something. Walt Disney Pictures Then when I was 9 I bought a Dragon Ball Z pencil box and that was that. Gotta get a tattoo of this Pumbaa quote. It's perfect. Walt Disney Pictures 23. OH MY GOD I DIDN'T KNOW HAKUNA MATATA WAS FROM HERE. I HAVE HEARD OF THIS SONG BEFORE. I AM NOT ENTIRELY IGNORANT. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via giphy.com Officially a better soundtrack than Hercules. I'm condemning this casual zebra slaughter. Let it be known. You can't just eat a whole fucking zebra, Simba. Jeez. Walt Disney Pictures 24. Simba's diet is fucked. Walt Disney Pictures And yet he has grown into a fine-ass lion over the course of about three bars of song. Intriguing. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via a.dilcdn.com Shifting to insect-based diet post-movie. 25. Oh Pumbaa, will you ever learn? Stars are obviously fireflies, stuck up in that big bluish-black thing, like Timon said. Walt Disney Pictures 26. There's monkey Yoda again. Jumping down trees. Not a walking stick in sight. He's on to something though, so I'll let it slide. Walt Disney Pictures Wow. This insane Yoda monkey with inconsistent usage of walking aids is our last hope. How to feel about this, I do not know. Walt Disney Pictures 27. We're going to lose Pumbaa. I can feel it. Life just isn't fair. And warthogs just aren't fast. Walt Disney Pictures Oh, wait. It's Nala! Yayyyyyyyyyy. Walt Disney Pictures 28. Wait. "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" is from The Lion King? WHAT THE. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via tumblr.com Hands down one of the most memorable soundtracks, and not just in Disney films. 29. Sexual tension between Nala and Simba doesn't feel all that messed up right now. I'm OK with this. Walt Disney Pictures Sexual tension replaced with crippling self-loathing. Just like real life. Walt Disney Pictures It ain't your fault, Simbs. Shit happens. Especially stampedes. If you're in a forest. 30. I swear to god this monkey is on meth. Walt Disney Pictures Yup, he just called Simba a baboon. This primate is tripping balls. Walt Disney Pictures 31. Oh, wait. I take that back. This is going to be some pivotal, revelatory shit. Walt Disney Pictures Aaaaaand now he's meditating on a rock. Still trippin'. Walt Disney Pictures 32. I hope this really is Mufasa and not some metaphorical mumbo-jumbo. My heart will not be able to take it. Walt Disney Pictures 33. CALLED IT. That's a reflection, you punk-ass monkey. Way to let a brother down. Walt Disney Pictures Aaaaaand now he's slipped Simba some acid. Just great. Walt Disney Pictures 34. Wow, it worked. This drug-addled, pseudo-crippled Yoda monkey actually did it. Who'da thunk it. Walt Disney Pictures 35. In a movie filled with amazing songs, I must admit that Timon's luau number is my personal favourite. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Walt Disney Pictures / Via pinterest.com 36. This is why you hire quality hitmen, Scar. You can't half-ass a coup and not expect repercussions. Walt Disney Pictures 37. Aaaagh, typical villain behaviour. Shut your damn pie-holes and finish the job for once in your life, antagonists. You idiots never learn. Walt Disney Pictures Chat shit, get banged, Scar. Chat shit. Get banged. Walt Disney Pictures 38. Amidst this all-out melee, meth-monkey is doing some serious damage. How, I do not know. Walt Disney Pictures (Steroids.) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Walt Disney Pictures YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Walt Disney Pictures 39. SIMBA WINS. And the hyenas have also found a temporary solution for their food shortage. Win-win. Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF Tap to play or pause GIF orig11.deviantart.net 40. Feel like "Eye of the Tiger" would be a proper song for this moment. Walt Disney Pictures Wait, wouldn't it be "Eye of the Lion", then? 41. And just like that, the land is glorious again. No mention of the rehabilitation process which must have included replanting trees, and attracting livestock with lucrative real estate prices. Walt Disney Pictures This is why I don't trust anyone. Let's just hope this heralds a decline in the merciless killing of animated zebras. Walt Disney Pictures 42. Still unsure as to how meth-monkey hasn't managed to drop a child off the cliff yet. Walt Disney Pictures THE END AND SORRY.