"Naked Attraction" Is The Most Utterly Stupid Dating Show On TV
People decide who to date by only being able to look at their private parts in a box. We have run out of dating show ideas. WE HAVE NO MORE IDEAS.
Two weeks ago we were treated to a new show called Undressed where people had to undress each other at first sight and then talk about FEELINGS.
It was a "unique dating concept" to find blahblahblah take your clothes off.
Now there is Naked Attraction, a new show where a person chooses who they want to date by looking at people naked in boxes one bit at a time.
This show is British. Welcome to post-Brexit Britain.
Boxes can be full of men or women. There's also a bisexual dater in the first episode, so some there's a combination of men and women in the boxes.
No, I am not making this shit up. They have to decide who to date based on seeing their potential dates like this. None of this show is censored.
NOTE: I AM PUTTING OMG STICKERS OVER EVERY PENIS AND VAGINA.
The contestant eliminates one person after looking at this part of their bodies.
This is kind of weird, because aren't we told all the time that personality is just as, if not more important than looks when it comes to dating? It just feels a little bit random and unnecessary.
Also, maybe his stance might be a bit weird because he's scared to have his willy out on TV? I don't know. I would have a much worse stance than this.
THEN WEIRDER STILL... The person they didn't like has to leave the box and say goodbye to them by walking out completely naked and giving them a hug.
This man is being rejected PURELY because of the look of his penis.
Hello, nice to meet you.
They then do several more rounds, with the contestant able to see more and more of their physical features.
The people have been chosen according to the dater's preferences. In the third round we can see their faces and in the fourth round we can hear their voice.
"Hello. I'd like to invite you to my professional network on LinkedIn."
And why does the show exist? Well, according to the show, "modern dating has become a complicated business".
Because of Tinder. Because we're wearing clothes. Yes, that's actually a reason. We can't see what people look like underneath when we're dating them because clothes are getting in the way of these things. LIFE IS SO COMPLICATED.
THEN THE SHOW TURNS EVEN WEIRDER. In the final round, when it is down to two people, the person choosing the date also gets naked and then they all chat about the chooser's body and physical features.
All compliments of course.
HAVE FUN ON YOUR HOT DATE.
They wear clothes for the date.
And good news... they are both dating and they didn't find seeing each other naked weird!
Well at least we solved a problem that didn't make sense.
This show is obviously all about boosting our body confidence and removing stigma, but does getting your genitals out on British TV actually prove anything?
Also, every conversation is a little bit WTF.
"What kind of vaginas do you like?"
"Do you like a big willy?"
This episode of Black Mirror is a bit far fetched #nakedattraction
Quite a few people on the show say that dating in this way is liberating and worth trying.
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Naked Attraction is on Channel 4 every Monday at 10pm and you can watch the first episode on All4.
BONUS: I added 31 OMG stickers to this BuzzFeed post.