1. It might look pretty, but can we talk about how volcanoes are big ol’ mountains that are also openings into the fiery crust of the Earth?
A big portal leading into the hellish sub-surface of the Earth. We just accept that that’s a thing?
8. But once it gets going, lava can flow up to 40 miles per hour. Which is damn fast for what’s basically a river of liquid fire.
Part fire, part earth, 100% annihilation. Source.
13. Lava also loves to bring its douchebag buddy volcanic ash to the party, who will be sure to try and fuck things up if magma didn’t get the job done.
Technically certain kinds of volcanic ash are called “tephra,” but let’s be real, that sounds more like a font name than murder-smoke.