1. Let's cut to the chase, you like drama:
2. But you're also fake as hell and pretend like you're a perfect angel who has descended from heaven to bring peace to the Earth:
3. You can't help yourself when something particularly juicy happens:
4. And even though you *HATE* the drama (wink, wink) you still have a moral responsibility to relay the dirty deets to those not fortunate enough to witness it:
5. As far as anyone's concerned, you're ALWAYS just an innocent bystander to drama. NO ONE needs to know you were the instigator:
6. I think it's important to reiterate that you're an angel, remember? There's no way you're capable of stirring up trouble:
7. But when someone ELSE starts drama, you sure as hell are finding the nearest front row seat as quickly as you possibly can:
8. Sometimes something so serendipitous happens that you just have to accept and own it. You didn't ask for this drama and that's all that matters:
When you piss someone off with a tweet that had nothing to do with them but you might as well own the drama
9. You can even spot drama from miles away while you're completely minding your own business:
10. No matter how much you pretend like you're too ~mature~ for the drama, you know you'll always be a petty 17-year-old at heart:
11. Just to be clear, you're only watching that drama-filled Snapchat story to get it off your timeline (obviously):
12. You'll be damned if some dramatic shit is going down and someone tries to distract you:
13. And even though you're SO above the drama, it always feels nice when something shady happens to your mortal enemy:
14. It's not your fault the walls in your apartment are so thin. You're practically obligated to listen:
15. And when someone decides to spill all their drama out of the blue, it'd be plain rude not to pay attention:
16. Drama is always more enjoyable when you're on the outside looking in:
17. Nothing brings you more pain than missing some extra juicy gossip:
18. But when you catch it right at the beginning, it turns into a full-blown event:
19. When someone asks about it later, you pretend to be above it because you're a saint and no one can tell you otherwise:
20. It's really a SHAME you hate drama, considering you're so good at sniffing it out:
21. But honestly, everyone probably knows you love the drama at this point. And if not, you’ll definitely expose yourself soon enough:
