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13 Ways To Prove You're Way More Interesting Than The Stupid Super Bowl

Prove that the world doesn't revolve around football. It revolves around you.

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Jon Premousch / Alice Mongkongllite / Buzzfeed

Whether your team just broke your heart or you couldn't care less about sports, the Super Bowl is here on Sunday, and you're going to have to deal with it.

Why not take control of the situation and host your very own party? A party that can focus on something you love more than anything else in the world, including the Broncos or the Panthers? I'm talking about YOU! After all, January was the most depressing month of the year, and you deserve to be pampered with attention. Here's how you can take control, you attention-whortle.

1. Over your TV, place a larger portrait of yourself to watch over your guests.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

2. Spell your name in all the food:

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

3. Make people fill out prop bets focused all around you.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

4. Put your face everywhere. Literally everywhere.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

5. Cut a hole in the bottom of a beer cooler so you can get right in there.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

6. Explain how you would have run each play while the play is happening.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

7. Pretend to choke at kickoff.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

8. Put on a ball gown and sing the national anthem louder than Lady Gaga.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

9. Don’t let anyone eat unless you’re feeding them yourself.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed
Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed
Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

10. Announce that you’re pregnant during the first touchdown.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

11. Show everyone how athletic you are by doing yoga poses in front of the TV.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

12. Don’t let people forget about you during their bathroom breaks.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

13. When your guests inevitably leave midway through the third quarter, make your dog sit on the couch and watch you dance. But know that if he could open doors, he too would GTFO.

Jon Premosch / Buzzfeed

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