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What Parents Say Vs. What They Actually Mean

Oh, sorry, you didn't realize we were speaking different languages?

1. What you say: "She just needs a nap."

What you mean: "She's freaking out and I have absolutely no idea why."

Twentieth Century Fox / Via

2. What you say: "I'm good."

What you mean: "I'm so tired I'm actually surprised I can form a complete sentence."

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3. What you say: "He's teething."

What you mean: "Sorry for the copious amounts of drool all over you."

Twentieth Century Fox / Via

4. What you say: "Sorry, I can't go out tonight. It’s been a long day for the family. Raincheck?"

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What you mean: "I’m baby-free tonight and just want to sit on my couch and watch Netflix without being interrupted."

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5. What you say: "Hey, buddy, let’s not do that, okay?"

What you mean: "Stop! STOP! For the love of God, we’re in public, please stop what you’re doing, kid!"

Fox TV / Via

6. What you say: "No, no, no I'm totally listening!"

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What you mean: "Wait, what?"

7. What you say: "Oh, it's not you."

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What you mean: "It's definitely you and something you are doing that is making my child cry."

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8. What you say: "I’m just gonna step into the restroom for a minute."

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What you mean: "I don’t actually have to pee. I just need more than thirty seconds to myself and, yes, I’ve locked the door."

9. What you say: "He's just being shy."

Disney / Via

What you mean: "I probably wouldn't want to talk to you either."

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10. What you say: "Uh oh! I think somebody went stinkers..."

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What you mean:"What kind of unholy stench is emanating from your child? Because it's definitely not from mine."

Twentieth Century Fox / Via

11. What you say: "Looks like someone's hungry!"

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What you mean: "If something doesn't change in the next five seconds, he's going to have a meltdown."

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12. What you say: "Can I call you back in a sec?"

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What you mean: "My kid’s doing something possibly life-threatening that requires my immediate attention, and I will definitely not remember to call you back."

Twentieth Century Fox / Via

13. What you say: "Hey, bud, whatcha got there? Can I see it?"

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What you mean: "Please don’t put something dangerous in your mouth. Please don’t put something dangerous in your mouth. Please don’t…aaand, great. You ate it."

Universal / Via

14. What you say: "Oh no! She’s never done that before!"

NBC / Via

What you mean: "She definitely did that to someone else last week, and I'm sure will do it again because my child is a tiny sociopath."

15. "He’s just going through a clingy phase."

Nat Geo / Via

What you mean: "My kid doesn't like you. Move on, please."

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16. What you say: "Sorry, my house isn't normally this messy."

What you mean: "It's usually much, much worse and I frantically hid piles of laundry when I heard you were coming over."

17. What you say: "Yeah, that sounds like you had a really rough night."

What you mean: "Oh, you ‘only’ got six hours sleep? That’s cute."

Bravo TV / Via

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