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Damn It, When Are They Finally Going To Sing On "Game Of Thrones"?

Where are the heart-stopping musical numbers we've been promised?

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I love musicals.

So when HBO announced it was producing a gigantic, seasons-long musical extravaganza set in a faraway fantasy world, I was ecstatic. Now, five seasons in, I'm still waiting to hear that first song.

From the opening chord's of the show's overture...

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...I've been hooked. The drama, the lavish costumes, the soaring personalities — Game of Thrones has everything I look for in an epic musical. But at this point, I'm getting anxious — I need to hear some singing!

The series has come so close to featuring the showstopping ballads it advertised.

Look at Tyrion during his trial. I really thought he was about to sing right here!

HBO

And why didn’t Tormund and the the Lord of Bones engage in a choreographed dance representing their complex intertribal negotiations? Seems like a missed opportunity to me.

HBO

Maybe the musical's creators think modern audiences want fewer songs. Maybe they're taking their time to set up the characters so the final two seasons can be all songs. I don't know.

But what I do know is that if we don’t hear some singing soon, theater lovers are going to start looking elsewhere for their musical fix.

Here are the characters I’m most looking forward to hearing sing:

3: Daenerys. Aren't the fighting pits of Meereen the perfect place for Dany to urge her people to come together using the power of song?

And just look at that gorgeous set!
HBO

And just look at that gorgeous set!

2: Cersei. She's the most fearsome musical mom since Gypsy's Rose!

I can't wait to hear the tart-tongued Queen Mother trade verses with the High Sparrow! Or maybe even a forbidden love duet with Jamie?
HBO

I can't wait to hear the tart-tongued Queen Mother trade verses with the High Sparrow! Or maybe even a forbidden love duet with Jamie?

1: Hodor. Musicals let characters express thoughts and feelings they could never say!

That's always been the promise of Game of Thrones.
HBO

That's always been the promise of Game of Thrones.

Maybe the problem is that the show started airing before the book was finished ("Book," for nonmusical fans, refers to the spoken parts of a musical.)

And, look, I appreciate that the creators of the show don't pander to theater lovers like me by having too many musical numbers. But would it kill the show's composers to have Margaery sing an "I Want" number about her quest for the Iron Throne? I don't think so.

Make your voice heard! Sign this petition to have HBO finally include the elaborate production numbers it’s been promising!

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