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7 Kardashian-Jenner Women Ranked By How Fucking Crazy Their Week Was

Try and keep up!

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Late last night a bipartisan coalition of senators struck down a last-ditch attempt by Republicans to repeal Obamacare, but instead of clicking on THAT article, you're here, reading about the Kardashians, AGAIN. So I do not want to see any crap in the comments section asking if I was paid to write this by Kris Jenner or why there's another article about this family. YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM.

If you're like me, it can be tough to keep track what all of the Kardashian-Jenner ladies are up to on a weekly basis. So to make our lives easier, I've rounded up what the ladies of the family have been up to for your reading pleasure!

E!

I've also ranked the ladies on how well their weeks went, from best to worst, because if nothing else I love to judge famous people mercilessly on the internet.

Without further ado...here's THIS WEEK IN KARDASHIAN-JENNER HISTORY!

1. Kris Jenner

Instagram: @krisjenner

What she's been up to: From what I can deduce from her social media, Kris has been living her best life in the south of France. And honestly, this momager deserves a fucking break. Whether it's dealing with Rob being Rob or Kendall drinking a fucking soda, Kris is honestly the hardest working woman in Hollywood. She's earned this vacation, and then some. While we're on it, can someone print-out a poster-size version of this picture of Kris (probably tipsy on rosé) on a yacht? I need it framed for my new apartment. DM me if you can.

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2. Kourtney Kardashian

What she's been up to: After some serious investigative journalism (JK, I spent five minutes on Instagram) it appears Kourtney is ALSO on vacation looking unbothered as hell while Lord Disick runs around Hollywood with Bella Thorne. Honestly, we could all be a little more like Kourtney.

3. Kim Kardashian

instagram.com / Via @kimkardashian

What she's been up to this week: Can you believe Kim's cocaine/marble table incident of 2017 was over TWO WEEKS ago?! Man, this year is a trip. Anyway, this has been a pretty standard week for Miss Kimberly — a few sponsored Instagram posts, an announcement that her KKW Beauty line was restocking, etc. But she gets bonus points for the EXCELLENT throwback caption on the this picture: "The wind you guys....is this necessary." Come through Kim!

4. Khloé Kardashian

What she's been up to this week: Lots of posts about her Good American clothing line, and it also looks like she's been spending time with her NBA boo Tristan Thompson during his offseason. Cute! Also I think she dyed her hair to a color called "bronde" (blonde + brown? IDK) which yes, really does count as news.

5. Kendall Jenner

instagram.com / Via @kendalljenner

What she's been up to this week: Honestly, not much. She's been quiet on social media and hasn't launched any product endorsements for any sodas recently, so this was actually a pretty good week for her all things considered.

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6. Kylie Jenner

instagram.com / Via @kyliejenner

What she's been up to: Last week Not-Minogue's wax figure debuted at Madame Tussaud's and this week the reality teenager ended up in hot water for potentially lifting designs from another artist (in this case, the lips in the title for her new reality show). All in all, this isn't really that different from a normal week for America's most famous teenager...but that doesn't mean it was a GOOD week. In more positive news, it looks like she's going vegan — at least for the moment.

7. Caitlyn Jenner

There are 15,000 patriotic transgender Americans in the US military fighting for all of us. What happened to your p… https://t.co/e1JoDfKTFc

What she's been up to: Caitlyn subscribes to the Khloé Kardashian Skool of PR where she says questionable shit first, and asks questions later. So when President Donald Trump announced a ban on transgender men and women serving in the military, of COURSE Caitlyn had to weigh in. Great! Taking a stand! The only problem is, as MANY people on the internet pointed out, she's a die-hard Republican who publicly expressed support for Trump during the election. Caitlyn, you were warned! And that's why she's at the bottom of this list.