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How Stereotypically Blonde Are You?

Like, it's not a hair color, it's a lifestyle.

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  1. Whatever, like, check off the stuff that applies to you on this list. Duh!

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    You’re like, totes a natural blonde.
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    You dye your hair blonde.
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    You’re hot (DUH, of course you are.)
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    You’re so hot, people ask you why you aren’t an actor or actress.
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    Or a model.
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    You’re like, so popular.
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    You can’t help it that you’re popular.
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    You own a small dog.
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    Pink is your favorite color, obvi.
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    Someone has called you “Marilyn,” “Barbie,” or some other famous blonde’s name.
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    People are always jealous of you for just being you. Ugh.
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    You don’t just love to have fun. You LOVE to have fun.
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    Admittedly, you’re the life of the party.
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    That’s because like, you have an AMAZING personality.
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    Or, you might be an ice-cold bitch. Like, whatever.
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    People make fun of you for being blonde.
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    You’ve had a blonde moment this week.
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    You’ve had a blonde moment today. Whatevs.
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    You’ve had several blonde moments today.
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    You’ve used “having a blonde moment” as an excuse before.
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    You use a special shampoo and conditioner for your hair because your hair is SPECIAL.
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    You know the difference between “blonde” and “blond.”
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    Maybe you’re the “blonde” one in your friend group.
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    Or maybe most of your friends are blonde.
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    You’ve considered dying your hair a different color.
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    Then you realized that would be silly, because you already have the best hair color in the world.
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    That’s because blondes do it better.
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    You’ve actually used the phrase, “Blondes do it better.”
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    Also, you’ve used the phrase, “Blondes have more fun.”
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    That’s because you know blondes actually DO have more fun.
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    Iced coffee is your drink of choice, because it's totes lo-cal.
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    Unless you’re drinking Diet Coke.
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    Or white wine, for when you want to let loose.
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    You’d rather be partying than at the library or work.
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    You’d rather be at the beach than at the library or work.
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    Actually, you’d rather be anywhere in the world than at the library or work.
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    Your hair is a different color during the summer.
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    You LOVE the summer, because your hair looks so different.
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    People ask whether your hair color is real or not.
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    You’ve been told by someone that they would pay to have hair like yours.
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    You’ve gotten away with something because you are blonde.
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    People have been surprised when you say something smart.
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    You get pissed when people assume you are a dumb blonde. Like, ew!
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    You’ve had to make it clear to someone that you are not a “dumb blonde.” As if!
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    Someone has made a dumb blonde joke at your expense.
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    You have laughed at said joke, even though it wasn’t funny, because you’re better than that. Over it!
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    That being said, you’ve made a few dumb blonde jokes of your own.
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    But really, you’re more than just a pretty face.
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    You’re Team Jen. Like, HELLO.
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    You just cannot understand people who are Team Angelina.
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    You have a strong opinion on people who dye their hair blonde.
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    Especially celebrities.
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    And especially Miley Cyrus.
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    You know that strawberry isn’t just a fruit, ash isn’t just a tree, and honey isn’t just something bees make.
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    You do that thing where you toss your hair for dramatic effect.
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    You totally * get * Regina George.
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    Also, “Legally Blonde” speaks to you on a different level.
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    Also, “Clueless” does too.
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    You take pride in being a Marilyn and not a Jackie.
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    Someone has touched your hair because it is blonde.
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    You’ve dressed up as a bunny for Halloween.
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    You say “like” a lot.
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    Also, “whatever.”
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    “Whatever” is your preferred response in most situations.
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    Sometimes, you “can’t even.”
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    Or maybe you “literally can’t even.”
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    You also like to abbreviate words, like “whatevs.”
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    Also, “totes.”
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    And you punctuate your sentences with “ugh” a lot. Like, “Ugh, whatevs!”
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    Also, you laugh a lot.
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    People ask if you’re from California ALL the time.
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    You’re actually from California.
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    You’ve been surfing.
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    You have driven a convertible.
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    You own an iPhone.
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    It’s a white iPhone, because DUH.
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    It’s hard to find someone to date who is as attractive as you.
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    There are always going to be haters.
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    But that’s fine. They’re all just jealous they’re not blonde like you.
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    You know that blonde is more than just a hair color. It’s a lifestyle.
 
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