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A Definitive Ranking Of The Best "Mean Girls" Quotes

Don't even THINK of sitting with us.

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As any true cinephile knows, the 2004 seminal classic Mean Girls is scientifically proven to be the most quotable movie of all time. But the question remains: What are the BEST quotes from Mean Girls?

To answer this question, BuzzFeed employed a highly scientific equation — hereafter referred to as the "Fetch Factor" — in ranking quotes from Mean Girls. As such, these rankings should be considered binding and final — like the Burn Book.

71. "On Oct. 3, he asked me what day it is." [out loud]: "It's Oct. 3."

Paramount Pictures / Via cmcajigas.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: The least fetch, because, like, everyone and their mother cannot wait until Oct. 3 every year so they can post this quote on Facebook.

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68. "This is the fertility vase of the Ndebele tribe. Does that mean anything to you."

Paramount Pictures / Via pophangover.com

Fetch Factor: Some fetch points, but only because Cady's mom (does anyone know her real name?) pulls off this line with such sincerity. She deserved an award nomination.

67. “There are two kinds of evil people in this world. Those who do evil stuff and those who see evil stuff being done and don’t try to stop it.”

Paramount Pictures / Via novafm.com.au

Fetch Factor: Sort of fetch. Randomly, Mean Girls has a lot of deep quotes and this is the first on the list.

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66. “And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.”

Paramount Pictures / Via cheezburger.com

Fetch Factor: Not that fetch. But hey, at least we get to laugh at homeschooled kids!

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61. “I have this theory that if you cut off all her hair she’d look like a British man.”

Paramount Pictures / Via suicideblonde.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Not that fetch. Sounds kind of forced, when you think about it — and at this point, Cady has descended into Plastic hell.

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58. Gretchen: "My hairline is so weird." Regina: "My pores are huge." Karen: "My nail beds suck." Cady: "I have really bad breath in the morning."

Paramount Pictures / Via mtv.com

Fetch Factor: Sort of fetch? I mean, does it piss anyone else off that the worst thing Karen could complain about were her nail beds? Like, ~ whatever ~ gurl, you can put your whole fist in your mouth.

57. "It's like I have ESPN or something."

Paramount Pictures / Via thegloss.com

Fetch Factor: Pretty fetch. Before Mean Girls ESPN was just a regional sports network that showed Ping-Pong. Then, this movie put the channel on the map — and the rest is history. Stuart Scott, you can thank Karen Smith for your career.

55. "Is your muffin buttered? Would you like us to assign someone to butter your muffin?"

Paramount Pictures / Via jacquelinetiongson.wordpress.com

Fetch Factor: Minimal fetchness, because EW EW EW he is so sleazy and now we can never enjoy a muffin the same way again.

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54. "Do you guys need anything? Some snacks? A condom? Let me know. Oh god, love you."

Paramount Pictures / Via neontommy.com

Fetch Factor: Slightly fetch, but also weird because the lady from "Weekend Update" is about to see the guy from Homeland screw her daughter who is also the girl from The Notebook.

53. "I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy."

Paramount Pictures / Via s1.zetaboards.com

Fetch Factor: Actually, pretty fetch despite the fact she DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE. And also, that rainbows and smiles cake would taste like SHIT.

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50. "I, like, invented her, you know what I mean?"

Paramount Pictures / Via mean-girls-quotes.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Sly in its fetchness. I mean, you feel sort of sorry for Regina at this point, until you realize she has a smokin' hot boyfriend, drives a silver Lexus, and is also a raging bitch.

49. "She's a life ruiner. She ruins people's lives."

Fetch Factor: I mean, it's fetch. Not exactly the most descriptive way to analyze Regina, but it gets the job done.

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46. "She's a scum-sucking road whore. She ruined my life!"

Paramount Pictures / Via miicheleweinberger.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Right-on fetch. Janice Ian serves some angsty teen realness throughout the movie, and this is a prime example. Also, this is an insult we all should use more often. Go on, call the next person you see a "scum-sucking road whore."

45. "These sweatpants are all that fit me right now."

Paramount Pictures / Via runningoffthereeses.com

Fetch Factor: Stretched to the fetchness. Although we all learned a valuable lesson: If you don't speak Swedish, you'll accidentally eat protein bars that will make you gain weight like crazy.

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39. "I don't think that my father, the inventor of Toaster Strudel, would be too pleased to hear about this."

Paramount Pictures / Via s1322.photobucket.com

Fetch Factor: Toasty fetch. Also, Gretchen has a point. Except how did we not see ANYONE consume a Toaster Strudel in Mean Girls? I bet her father wouldn't be too pleased about that either.

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37. "In girl world, Halloween is the one night a year when a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."

Paramount Pictures / Via i-know-he-knows.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Like, SO fetch. If anything, this quote hits the nail a little TOO on the head.

36. Cady: "Is there alcohol in this?" Mrs. George: "Oh god, honey, no! What kind of mother do you think I am? Why, do you want a little bit? Because if you're gonna drink I'd rather you did it in the house."

Paramount Pictures / Via survivingcollege.com

Fetch Factor: Def fetch. Mrs. George has, like, five lines in this movie, and they are all so ~ quotable ~.

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31. "One time, she punched me in the face. It was awesome."

Paramount Pictures / Via glee.wikia.com

Fetch Factor: Hella fetch. Not only does she have a wide-set vagina, but Regina punched her in the face. Some girls have all the luck.

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30. Damian: "My nana takes her wig off when she's drunk." Ms. Norbury: "Your nana and I have that in common."

Paramount Pictures / Via pinterest.com

Fetch Factor: Can we all admit that Ms. Norbury might be the best part of Mean Girls? Are we even surprised, considering Tina is queen? QUEEN TINA.

28. "Ex-boyfriends are just off-limits to friends. I mean, that's just, like, the rules of feminism!"

Paramount Pictures / Via fuckyeahmessylife.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Fairly fetch. I mean, we've all heard this rule IRL, and we've also all probably broken this rule too.

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23. "We should totally just stab Caesar!"

Paramount Pictures / Via sahjan.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: 2 FETCH 4 U. Gretchen ~ cracks ~ and it truly is a sight to behold. Also, a great history lesson for all of us who didn't know who Julius Caesar was before watching this movie.

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21. "One time, she met John Stamos on a plane, and he told her she was pretty."

Paramount Pictures / Via multitudeofgifs.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: SO, so, so, so fetch. I mean, what girl (or guy, for that matter) DOESN'T dream of John Stamos telling them they're pretty?

20. “I can’t go to Taco Bell. I’m on an all-carb diet. God, Karen, you are so stupid!”

Paramount Pictures / Via eonline.com

Fetch Factor: Not that fetch, because that's not how Taco Bell works. Um, just order a fucking quesadilla, Regina.

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17. “That’s why her hair is so big. It’s full of secrets.”

Paramount Pictures / Via katarinas-seaside-rendezvous.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Definitely fetch, but, like, you KNOW Damian cooked up this line months ago and has just been waiting to use it on some new girl.

16. "One time I saw Cady Heron wearing army pants and flip-flops. So I bought army pants and flip-flops."

Paramount Pictures / Via eonline.com

Fetch Factor: Weirdly fetch. Like, we all knew this girl in high school and avoided her like the plague but she's quietly one of the best parts of Mean Girls.

15. "Oh my god, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white."

Paramount Pictures / Via eonline.com

Fetch Factor: Pretty fetch. I mean, yeah, we were all thinking the same thing as Karen. But leave it to Gretch to be the voice of reason. CLASSIC, am I right?

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14. Karen: "I can't go out. I'm sick." * coughs * Regina: "Boo, you whore."

Paramount Pictures / Via eonline.com

Fetch Factor: SO fetch. Basically, if you ever need to peer-pressure someone, just say, "Boo, you whore" and you're golden.

13. "I'm not like a regular mom. I'm a cool mom."

Paramount Pictures / Via ginobambino.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Like, so fetch. Like, everyone's mom has said this at one point or another, right? It's just that not every mom has rock-hard implants ready to crush you every time she goes in for a hug.

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9. "You all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it OK for guys to call you sluts and whores."

Paramount Pictures / Via twosidesreallies.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Fetch as fuck, because as much as we were laughing throughout the movie, Ms. Norbury hit pretty close to home.

8. "The limit does not exist."

Paramount Pictures / Via twisted.wikia.com

Fetch Factor: HELLA fetch. I mean, no one actually knows what Cady means, but this sounds like some deep shit. Also, you can say it in basically any situation. "How many chicken nuggets can I eat?" THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.

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6. "Gretchen, I’m sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble. And I’m sorry for telling everyone about it. And I’m sorry for repeating it now.”

Paramount Pictures / Via thehotzoneusa.com

Fetch Factor: SO fetch. Barnes & Noble would be IRRELEVANT if it were not for this quote.

3. "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George's life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you."

Paramount Pictures / Via yummmyasians.tumblr.com

Fetch Factor: Way, way fetch. Yeah, it's not a super zinger. But when you boil Mean Girls down to a single message, doesn't this quote have to take the cake?