1. Scare the crap out of car salesmen.
2. Learn mixed martial arts.
3. Bring back the 'stache.
5. Host a TV show.
Gordon led a fan poll in 2011 when "Live with Regis & Kelly" needed a replacement for Regis (former NFL star Michael Strahan got the gig). Gordon previously guest-hosted the show with Ripa, and he also appeared on SNL in 2003.
6. Focus on his daughter's racing career.
7. Keep racing.
He wouldn't be the first driver — or athlete — to change his or her mind and keep competing after all. And in his statement Thursday, he didn't use the "R-word," keeping open the possibility of returning for races in the future.