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17 Questions I Have For My Generation

We have some things we need to talk about, guys.

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Don't worry, this isn't another one of *those* articles. You know the ones — they always talk about how we're to blame for something, or how we killed a dying industry. We're self- and selfie-obsessed, we're entitled, and we're lazy. But, hey, at least we know how to send an e-mail @BabyBoomers.

Personally, I think millennials are extremely talented, just over-stimulated and weirdly obsessed with avocados. That's an article for another day. That said, though, we have a few questions I think we all really need to answer.

1. When did we all start caring about each other's eyebrows?

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And why did we wax them all off in 7th grade?

2. Can we start referring to ourselves as "sad, broke, adults who love tagging their friends in memes" instead of "millennials"?

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Just trying to be realistic over here.

3. Why are we all so obsessed with avocado toast?

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I mean, it's good, but is it really that good?

4. Does anyone actually enjoy going out on Halloween/NYE?

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Bueller? Bueller?

5. Why do all sorority girls insist on doing the door stack recruitment video?

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Doesn't that hurt? Like, really, really badly?

6. Can we all finally admit that we stalk the you-know-what out of each other on social media?

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What did you do last summer? (LOLZ JK I already know).

7. Can we bring back the Spice Girls?

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And on that note, can we return Taylor Swift?

8. How are some of us still confusing "you're" and "your"?

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It's really not that hard. You're better than this.

9. Is it finally time to stop saying things like "fam," "it's lit," and "hype"?

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If not, can it be?

10. Have we all ruined dating forever?

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I think the answer to this is yes. Thanks, Obama.

11. Do you guys realize how trashy "The Bachelor" is?

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I hate to break it to you, but like, come on.

12. Why do we care what Kylie Jenner does?

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She drives around in a Range Rover and makes weird faces on Snapchat. Moving on.

13. Can one of us finally invent a way to un-send a text?

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Just do me this one, small favor, would you?

14. Can we settle this Shake Shack vs. In-N-Out Burger debate once and for all?

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The most pressing issue of our generation right here.

15. Do you think any of us could *actually* keep a Tamagotchi alive now?

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I don't know about you guys, but I can barely boil water sooooo...

16. Have any of us ever blacked out from eating too much pizza?

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It's had to happen to someone, right?

17. Do any of us actually know what we're doing?

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No? Ok, same. Cool. Glad we had this talk.

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