A few weeks ago, Spanish citizen Carlota Burrel Mas was denied entry into Gurgaon housing colony Palm Grove Heights to visit her friend, Mohit Agarwal, as society rules forbade female guests inside bachelors' apartments.
Mas had come all the way from Barcelona for an internship and was planning to stay with Agarwal for a few days till her accommodation was sorted. He detailed the incident in a Facebook note on October 27.
As the note went viral, single men and women from all over the country started replying with anecdotes of how moral policing was an issue in housing societies everywhere.
And then there were the few commenters who took the management's side by stating that staying with men is not acceptable behaviour, and also questioning whether the "girl's parents were aware of all this".
However, with one epic reply, Mas shut down the moral police and everyone else who agreed with their stance.
"I am a grown-up, independent and self-reliant woman so there is no need to let my parents know what I do and what I don’t. It is because of people like you that, in some communities, women are stuck and cannot move on," Mas wrote.
"I knew that India is a bit conservative but I wasn't expecting something like this at all. What these guys in Palm Grove Heights did was to cut our own individual freedom," Mas told BuzzFeed.
The management has since apologised to Agarwal and Mas, saying that such incidents won't occur again. You can read Mas' reply in full here:
I am the girl who was invited at Mohit’s place couple of weeks ago.
My name is Carlota, I am from Barcelona and I am 24 years old. First of all, I am a grown-up, independent and self-reliant woman so there is no need to let my parents know what I do and what I don’t but as we have a good relationship they were aware that I was going to spend couple of nights at Mohit's house and actually they were really happy that a good friend was helping me out on the very first days in a new different country. They didn't believe me when I told them that the security guards didn’t let me in, they could not understand why, neither Mohit or I had done anything wrong.
I have worked since I am 16 years old, I have a Bachelor’s in Humanities and I am doing an internship in Human Rights in Delhi. Hence, the stay at my male friend’s place doesn’t have anything to do with working, growing, competing or doing your own identity. Moreover I also have my own identity luckily since I am pretty young but it is people like you that oppress female gender to develop and to have the same rights that men have, it is because people like you that in some communities, women are stucked and cannot move on. So, no, Deepak, staying at my friend's does not prevent me to work or grow. On the contrary, I am expanding my points of view and knowledge listening about his culture, his language and about India. But at the end I don't really have to justify myself because who the hell are you to say what a woman or her parents should care or worry about?
By the way, I let you know that you don’t know what you are talking about when you say ‘this is not acceptable by any parents in any society anywhere in the world’. As I told you, I am from Barcelona (Spain, Europe) where I can go to my male friends houses to hang out, watch a movie, drink a beer, stayover, play cards or do whatever we want to do, there is no one that is going to tell me ‘You can’t do that’ and no one can forbid me the entrance at anyone's place if I am invited by the owner as it would be illegal. I also know how it works in the rest of Europe and I can assure you that no one would say a single word against spending a night at a male single friend place (except very old people and very religious people, even my grandma accepts that I sleep at male friends house :D) Seriously, nobody fucking cares if I spend some days at his place, because you know, there are more important things in the world going on and this is the 21st century.
Last thing you should know is that I don't need the approval of any man, husband, boyfriend or parents because I am an adult, and this is only my own life, I choose how to live it, I take my own decisions and I don't let guys like you tell me what I gotta do because no one has the right to tell me how I should behave or how to live my life. Worry about your stuff and let women be whatever they want to be.