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First World / Third World Problems Throughout History

Privilege can be a bummerfest, right? Thankfully, in addition to next-day delivery and HBO GO, you have the comfort of history to help keep you on the smug path to righteous! Hop aboard this chrono-cruise as we explore the First World / Third World problems of yore.

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1. Ancient Rome

First World Problem: The Stains!



Red wine, white tunic, and 2,000 years between you and a Clorox bleach pen.

Third World Problem: The Lions!



The Romans may have overrun my homeland, killed my family, enslaved me, and dragged me to a foreign country to kill other slaves for entertainment, but at least the gladiator arena represents a kind of skill-based meritocr-- wait, what's in the cage?

2. The Aztec Empire

First World Problem: Head Accessories



This ornamental pheasant headpiece does NOT match my turquoise necklace. I HATE YOU MOM

Third World Problem: Head Retention



Sometimes, sacrifices have to be made for the good of the Fifth Age. Lookin' at you, Mixtecs.

3. Isabella and Ferdinand's Spain

First World Problem: Jews and Muslims Pretending to be Christians



Look, just let me watch you eat this ham and we're cool.

Third World Problem: Soldiers and Fugitives Pretending to be Explorers



Hey Columbus, welcome to our contiNEVERMIND NEVERMIND NEVERMIND

4. Victorian England

First World Problem: Royal Society Blows its Annual Budget Printing "On the Origin of the Species"



Damn, Charles Darwin, how many copies do you need?

Third World Problem: Victorian England



Damn, Victorian England, how many countries do you need?

5. Today

View this video on YouTube

Well, we've come a long way, humanity, but our travails continue, and in many ways, we struggle with the same existential issues suffered by our forebears. (Hint: Lions are still definitely a problem.) Thankfully, as the video above illustrates, no matter which world we hail from, we all have the power to break the cycle and blow up stereotypes.

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