1.
2.
When you’re on a roller coaster and you know the camera is coming up
3.
@KaceyMusgraves When my friends tell me a rumor and I have to act like I didn’t start it
4.
Guy in the pickup honking, yelling at woman to move out of the street. She yells back "my dog is shitting, wait a minute!" I ❤️ NY
5.
my mom: u should eat breakfast lunch & dinner doctors: u should eat breakfast lunch & dinner my friends: u should eat breakfast lunch & dinner the news: u should eat breakfast lunch & dinner me: okay so what im hearing is dunch (dinner lunch) & then a second, darker dinner
6.
So coworker received some flowers this morning from a random person, She told her man about it and her man acted quick 😂
7.
*battlefield turns into a giant orgy* Cupid: sorry sorry, these are the only type of arrows I have
8.
Folding table: *exists* Frat guy off two mikes hard lemonades:
9.
I guess...
10.
One of the kids at my job wrote me a nice lil letter 🙂
11.
Astrology Girls will straight up hit you with their car and say “whoops lol, it’s because I’m a caprisun”
12.
me: my father went out for cigarettes ten years ago and- sloth dad: *opening door* forgot my wallet
13.
me holding back on the good news until it’s fuIIy confirmed
14.
murderer: any last words me: are u mad at me
15.
My annoying ass being annoying then getting shocked when someone actually gets annoyed.
16.
Me: “Look but don’t make it obvious.” My friends:
