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    18 Hilarious Tweets Just From This Weekend Alone

    Loling rn.

    1.

    me: hi billie eilish: ๐Ÿ‘ ๐Ÿ‘ ๐Ÿ‘ƒ๐Ÿป ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ•ท ๐“ผ๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ด ๐“ฒ๐“ฝโ€™๐“ผ ๐“ฏ๐“ช๐“ด๐“ฎ?

    2.

    florence: run fast for your mother, fast for your father, run for your children, for your sisters and brothers me:

    3.

    judge: how do u plead? spill the tea sis๐Ÿ˜Œ defendant: all tea all shade? i hid the body๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿผ judge: omg sis ur cancelled and thatโ€™s that on THAT๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ’‹

    4.

    honestly..... this would totally be me as a spy

    5.

    6.

    Me running away from responsibilities and commitment

    7.

    8.

    9.

    12 year old me posting โ€œyou know my name, not my storyโ€ on facebook

    10.

    why does ur phone say โ€œbattery sufficiently chargedโ€ at 80% like girl thatโ€™s your opinion

    11.

    12.

    Maaaaaaan Iโ€™m trying to make an appointment with my barber to get a haircut and he trying to make an appointment with somebody else i guess๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿฝโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€ https://t.co/qbqAzMGvMr

    13.

    i hate when my friend starts dating an idiot and i have to be like how could you bring this man into our lives

    14.

    15.

    I donโ€™t want a sugar daddy but maybe like a sugar buddy. I just hit him up like โ€œHey how are you today?โ€ and he replies โ€œDoing great thanks for asking hereโ€™s $7,000. โ€œ

    16.

    the little bumps on the back of my tongue when i drink McDonald's sprite

    17.

    THEN the doctor pulls out his.....STETHOSCOPE NOOOO!!! YES!!

    18.

    the gays after knowing jessica lange is back for AHS

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