1. This new pet fail:
Brought home a new pet
2. This parachute fail:
Didn’t see tha coming tbh
3. This terrifying fail (P.S. he never found him):
somebody pls help me there’s a gigantic fucking spider in my room and it’s 2:30am and i just wanna fucking sleep
4. This disgusting airplane fail:
aw hell naw
5. This zoo enclosure fail:
Excuse me, sir. Do you have time to talk about our lord and savior, Godzilla???
6. This elephant pic fail:
"I said NO PICTURES, Bitch!"
7. This pick-up line DM fail:
These are the “dms” I get from guys
8. This bonkers Grindr fail:
9. This accidental text fail:
10. This marital fail:
I ran to protect our new TV when the #earthquake hit. My wife is pregnant. We’re having a conversation now.
11. This earthquake caption fail:
cheeks out for earthquakes
12. And finally, this conversation fail that turned into a win:
Told someone what city I live in. “Oh are you married to a doctor?” “No. My husband is though.”