Martha Stewart's "Dry January" Video Genuinely Made Me Spit Out My Coffee This Morning, And People Are Living For Her

    "This is a Super Bowl-worthy commercial."

    How's your Dry January going? Mine's not going too well, thanks for asking.

    But honestly, I'm considering giving it a second try after stumbling upon Martha Stewart's bizarrely brilliant campaign for everyone's least favorite month-long activity.

    closeup of Martha Stewart

    Last week, Martha partnered with Tito's vodka to kick off a campaign for "DIY January," which confused me deeply until I just watched the darn video.

    Closeup of Martha Stewart

    On Instagram, people were quick to call out the fact that it was basically worthy of Super Bowl commercial status.

    instagram comment: this is a super bowl worthy commercial!

    Like, it's so good that it even convinced non-Tito's drinkers to pick up a bottle, which kind of feels like the opposite intent of the campaign, but a marketing win nonetheless.

    instagram comment: i don't even drink tito's, but i will be picking up a bottle because of this ad.

    And I'm fully in agreement with the folks that demanded a raise for the entire Tito's team. (Honestly, send Martha's team a nice bonus while they're at it, too.)

    instagram comment: someone give the tito's marketing team a raise

    In the campaign, Martha introduces "DIY January" as a way to use up the Tito's you have lying around (since you're not drinking this month, remember?). Bold to assume that I'd ever have an unfinished bottle of vodka in my home, but I'll bite!

    screenshot of ad: tito's DIY january with martha stewart

    She then shares a whole slew of surprising non-drinking purposes for vodka, which, after doing some Googling, definitely all check out. You can deodorize stinky boots!

    screenshot of ad: spraying vodka into boots to deodorize them

    Instead of using your usual household cleaner, you can spray it on anything that needs cleaning to "cut through dirt and grime."

    screenshot of ad: martha cleaning a vase with tito's vodka

    Apparently, you can even add a splash to your fresh-cut flowers to keep them in bloom for longer!

    screenshot of ad: martha watering her flowers with tito's vodka

    (Reminder that Martha is Queen of Flowers, so I obviously believe her.)

    But beyond the vodka-related tips and hacks, it's her performance that proves she might also be the Queen of Partnerships, too.

    Like, pouring what cannot POSSIBLY be any less than two CUPS of vodka into her tomato sauce while staring into the camera with vacant eyes.

    screenshot of ad: martha pouring lots of vodka into her spaghetti sauce

    And spraying the "cleaning vodka" INTO HER MOUTH.

    screenshot of ad: martha spraying tito's vodka into her mouth

    ...and loving it, obviously.

    screenshot of ad: martha stewart smiling after tasting the vodka

    And then, casually using a full handle of the stuff to tenderize a slab of beef.

    screenshot of ad: martha slamming handle of tito's into beef to tenderize it

    Naturally, the video ends with her sitting in front of an ice cold martini, with a twist, exclaiming, "Oh, fuck it, Martha needs a drink."

    screenshot of ad:  martha about to sip a martini

    Anyway, Martha, I hope Tito's paid you enough to buy at least six more peacocks and a flock of fluff chickens. Because as the Queen of Partnerships, you deserve it all.

    Anyway, you can watch the entire video for yourself on YouTube or Tito's site. Refrain from sipping on anything while you watch it — you will do a spit take. I would know.

    View this video on YouTube

    Tito's Vodka