Why Are All Disney Horses Dicks?

What has four hooves and a serious attitude problem?

Behold the noble steed.

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For decades, Disney has brought these majestic creatures into the homes of people across the world.

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But it's time we had a talk...

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Disney horses are assholes.

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They are just plain rude.

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They have no control of their emotions.

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Chill it, mouth breather.

They act entitled AF.

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Dude, if you can stand on your hind legs, you can use your words. "Excuse me" is not that difficult.

They literally sit on you when you're down.

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I know this guy's a baddie, but really. People wonder why the plague stuck around for so long.

They give zero fucks about anything you have to say.

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Nah it's cool, I made copies. Thanks for asking.

Most concerning, though, is how very aggressive they are.

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Max, what you're doing there — it's exactly what killed Houdini.

Oh, I'm sorry that I didn't bring my knife to A FREAKIN' DISNEY MOVIE!

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This is the 10th century. You know your girl doesn't have access to a chiro.

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Sorry to be so candid, Disney.

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But your horses — they have got to check themselves.

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