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29 Tweets More Or Less Guaranteed To Make You Laugh Every Time

So shines a good tweet in a weary world.

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1.

This is the best thing I've seen all day

2.

when your mom is late picking you up from Starfish Club

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3.

Kicked out of school because I expressed myself

4.

lmao did I come on too strong?

5.

Meal prepping is so tedious but SO worth it 🙌🏽

6.

7.

Tb to when I was high and noticed my shadow looked like Rihanna

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8.

"Tell your kids to stop kicking my seat.."

9.

Well there it is. The bleakest thing I have ever seen.

10.

I'm getting old. I was going to get a beautiful shot of the full moon through the budding trees for @suepalkafox5dc… https://t.co/GCdOEvBf7V

11.

doggo went under for surgery and now he is DRUGGO

12.

Man photos himself every month since Inauguration Day

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13.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS HAPPENED Y'ALL????????????? RIP MY ICE CREAM

14.

My favorite character in Beauty and the Beast is this dresser waiting to fuck up a villager with a baseball bat.

15.

Each booth is an alternate reality.

16.

Never sell a golf club on Facebook to someone from East Kilbride!

17.

throwback to when the car insurance lady asked my mom for front, rear, & side views but she didn't get the memo..

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18.

BEN AFFLECK: I'm directing a new movie and I was thinking about you for the lead role BEN AFFLECK: Well I'm obviously very flattered

19.

Just spent 30 minutes searching for my dads iPad

20.

21.

Saw your boyfriend at the natural history museum

22.

there was an intruder alert on the security cam at my house today

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23.

It's been 3 days since I replaced my sisters goldfish with carrot's

24.

Umm should I be worried about this kid from my English class

25.

Okay. I know this cake is a number 1 and it says “Emma," but it LOOKS like a dick with balls that says “WEED"

26.

So weird that IKEA named a mattress after the only requirement I have for my ladies

27.

28.

his palms are sweaty knees weak arms are heavy there's

29.

how'd he have time to write all those plays then

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